The Tyranny of Lord Air BUd
by coolguy2020visi
Summary: A group of courageous heroes save the world from the evil lord Air Bud with the help of the earth's savior, Air Bud
1. Chapter 1: Taking out the trash

Charles hopped off the bus after he had quite a wacky day. The bus zipped away from the bus stop, and Charles turned to face the suburban establishment he called home. He approached the door and inserted his steel key into the lock, turning it with a click. The door swung open, and Charles entered the comfortable tranquility that filled his house. It was a Friday afternoon, and Charles closed the door behind him with a strange feeling that it was going to be a long weekend.

Charles headed straight for his room, laying on the bed with a sigh. He plucked his phone from his pocket and started the Youtube application. But before he could do so, his phone buzzed violently like a roly poly on a Mount Everest expedition. Shortly after imagining such a silly scenario as a pill bug pilgrimage, Charles realized that the vibration was triggered by a textual message. Charles switched to the Message application, where the text message awaited him.

(the next segment will have brackets around it to show that it's a text conversation so if you see it later now you know what it means k thx bae)

[initiate textual converstation]

Sniffer: yo whats up on this beautiful afternoon with the orange sun shine shinin down on us all

Billy: What's up with all the poetry you're doing lately

Billy: It's kind of annoying honestly

Sniffer: you know whats annoying

Sniffer: is when I turn on this cooking channel and I see all these snobs flaunting their noses around

Sniffer: auggh curse you autocorrect

Sniffer: trying to capitalize my I's

Sniffer: AUGH

Billy: Just turn it off

Sniffer: you really think I have the time to go all the way to the settings application

Billy: Um…

Billy: Yes?

Sniffer: ok

Billy: So is there any reason you sent me a textual message in the message application

Sniffer: just trying see whats hip and happenin with my brother

Billy: Ok well I'm kinda trying to just hang out alone so

Sniffer: fine never speak to me again fine

Sniffer: I hope you die

Billy: No it's not like that man come on

Sniffer has closed the message application

Billy; aw snap

[deinitiate textual conversation]

It was at this time when Charles started to realize how odd the whole naming thing him and his friends organized for the message application. His name on the message application was Billy, and his friend's message name was Sniffer, though conveniently Charles could not recall his real name, and is thus a terrible friend. Charles and his group of goons just started doing it suddenly. There is absolutely no reason for it, and it will probably never be of importance.

Charles suddenly recalled his original plan for the evening, and restarted the Youtube application. He noticed a brand new episode of Book Hypothesis, his favorite series. It seemed that this brand new episode was a hypothesis on Charles' favorite novel too, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. Charles never actually read the first two books, but he loved Prisoner of Azkaban. In fact, he filled a whole composition book with all his Prisoner of Azkaban hypotheses. The one he was most proud of is the one where buckbeak is actually dead the whole time and the entire book takes place in his hallucinations in his final moments.

After viewing the Book Hypothesis video, Charles could say for certain that it was a great hypothesis. There's really nothing else that needs to be said about the whole debacle.

Now that Charles had his down time, he thought it was time to take out the trash. He sauntered to his kitchen and grabbed the roll of trash bags, ripping a bag off of the roll. He then proceeded to open the bag, and then walked to every room in his house, gradually filling up his bag with trash. When the bag was filled, Charles tied his masterful square knot using two ends of the bag. Now that the bag was secure so that trash would not fall out of the top, Charles hefted the large bag to his trash bin outdoors, in his backyard. He approached the green bin slowly, gradually making his way to the rectangular prism. Charles was just about there when he noticed some trash spilling out of the bag. He leaned down and saw the ripped hole from which the trash was spilling out of. With a groan, Charles made his way back into his home to look for some sort of bonding agent to repair the hole. He went to his room and rummaged through his drawers, eventually stumbling upon a roll of duct tape. He retraced his steps, making his way back the the trash bag. When he had made it to the trash bag, Charles ripped a foot of tape from the roll. He placed the piece of tape cleanly over the hole, bonding the two sides of the hole together, thus sealing the hole. Charles then took a long breath, lifting the large sack of garbage above him and tossing it into the bin. The bin then fell over, and with another groan, Charles turned the bin right side up, with the bag of trash sitting neatly inside it. After entering his home once more, Charles could safely say that the whole fiasco that just unfolded was essential to the story and not just a waste of time.

Charles sat down in his chair with a sigh, opening his backpack to review the load of homework that he had to accomplish this weekend. He recalled that he had a science project due on Monday, and he hadn't even started it! He cursed on plague on both his houses, and started brainstorming for what he wanted to create for his science fair project. After what seemed like ages, he decided to turn to one of his brightest contacts. Charles opened up his phone and entered the Message application.

[initiate textual conversation]

Billy: I need your help

Billy: Yet again

Rosebud: What kind of advice are you in need for, my friend?

Billy: The science fair

Billy: I have absolutely no idea what I'm going to do

Rosebud: Don't you know how to make some kind of nuclear reactor?

Billy: Yes

Rosebud: Why not do that?

Billy: Ugh

Billy: But I know everybody's going to do that

Rosebud: True.

Billy: I know!

Billy: I'll use the turnip serum I created the other day

Rosebud: So, you didn't need my help at all.

Billy: Guess not

Billy: Not sure where I put all the ingredients though

Rosebud: What do you need?

Billy: 3 liters of detergent, 2 cups of sulfur, and a quart of bleach

Rosebud: Well, the detergent should be in your laundry room, sulfur in your bedroom, and bleach is probably in the basement.

Billy: Dang

Billy: How do you know all this

Rosebud: I have my connections.

Billy: Ok sure

Charles made his way to the laundry room. Above the washing machine was a jug of Downy detergent, which is the only good detergent, as studies show. He grabbed the detergent, and placed it on the table lying in the middle of the living room. It was a central room for groups, but since he lived alone, it kind of just became his chemistry table. Well, kind of alone…

Charles reached down under his bed to find the mound of sulfur he collected there. He grabbed a handful and placed it on his table with the detergent.

Rosebud: Have you found all your supplies yet?

Billy: Yee

Billy: All that's left is

The basement.

Charles peered down the rickety steps at the cold dark corridor that lied below. He loathed the basement. In fact, he should probably leave the bleach up here for the next time he makes his turn-

Rosebud: What?

Billy: What?

Rosebud: What do you have left?

Billy: Oh sorry I forgot to put it in the textual conversation

Billy: I guess I was too distracted by

The basement.

Charles peered down the rickety steps at the cold dark corridor that lied below. He loathed the basement. In fact, he should probably leave the bleach up here for the next time he makes his turn-

Rosebud: WHAT?

Billy: Oops I done it again

Billy: The basement

Speaking of the basement, Charles peered down the rickety steps at the cold dark corridor that lied below. He loathed the basement. In fact, he should probably leave the bleach up here for the next time he makes his turn-

Charles kind of lost his train of thought, and decided to just go down to the basement already. As he descended, shadows engulfed him. He used the flashlight functionality on his cellular phone to see the room that lied in front of him. Chills ran down his spine as he approached the jar of bleach that stood neatly on a crate 2 feet in front of him.

Too neatly…

Charles grabbed the jar, half expecting something horrible to happen in seconds. To his surprise however, nothing of the sort occurred.

Rosebud: Did you get the bleach yet?

Billy: Yep

Billy: I'm bringing it up right now and putting it with the oth

Rosebud: Um… Charles?

Rosebud: Are you there?

The phone fell out of Charles' hand as a warm breath hit his neck. He slowly turned his head and gasped as he came face to face with the greatest terror he had ever witnessed.

TO BE CONTINUNED…


	2. Chapter 2: Here comes the bud

previously on dargon ball zzz

Charles had a chat with Sniffer (which ended horiibly) and took out the trash. (remember that its important) He then started to create a turnip serum for the science fair on Monday, but while searching for bleach in the basement, he got spooked by something behind him.

And now…

We return to your regular programming.

Charles felt a warm breath hit his neck as he dropped his phone. He turned to face behind him and came face to face with the most unspeakable horror he had ever witnessed…

It was a Golden Retriever with half of his face covered in peanut butter.

Air Bud.

Charles hated Air Bud. He was annoying at best, and sadistic at worst. Charles had no idea where Air Bud came from, or why he never seemed to go away. All he knows is that Air Bud remained in this house for as long as he could remember, and now he stood in front of Charles next to an empty jar of Jif Peanut Butter®. Charles spent all of his savings on that peanut butter, and now Air Bud was going to pay for it.

Charles charged at Air Bud, pulling his trusty dirking device out of his back pocket. Utilizing the famous Qwirkle technique, Charles took a swing at Air Bud's left foot.

MISS

Charles fell flat on his face, his attack completely missing his mark. He now had to wait 4-5 business days for Air Bud's retaliation attack. These are the rules in Scrabble, which is a real time battle game Charles and Air Bud have been playing for years. One person attacks, then a week later the other person, and the cycle continues. This goes on infinitely, or until one person gives up the 5$ Sonic Gift Card that is the prize for winning the game. Or until one of the players dies, and the other takes the gift card and gets a celebratory popcorn chicken.

Charles was horrible at Scrabble. He's been practicing many techniques and strategies for ages, but nothing gets past Air Bud. He considered giving up the gift card for a long time, but…

That chicken…

Anyhow, Charles got the wind handed to him by his own attack, and Air Bud fled upstairs. Charles reached for his cellular telephone and opened up the message application to resume the textual conversation he had started with Rosebud.

[reinitiate textual conversation]

Rosebud: Um…Charles?

Rosebud: Are you there?

Billy: Yeah

Billy: I just got the wind handed to me by my own attack

Rosebud: Playing Scrabble with Air Bud again?

Billy: Yee

Billy: I can never beat him

Billy: The amount of gigawatts in his capacitor

Billy: Its simply ace-tounding

Rosebud: What's up with that dog anyways?

Billy: Who knows?

Billy: I just hope I can get my revenge for all the peanut butter I lost to him.

Billy: Curse you Air Bud!

Billy: Plague on both your houses!

Rosebud: Can you just bring the bleach upstairs

Rosebud: Maybe working on that turnip serum will take your mind off of things.

Billy: ok

Charles got up from the ground after the semi-annual beatdown, and dragged himself back to the living room, bleach in tow. He set the bleach on the chemistry table, and prepared a large bowl and measuring cups to mix together the serum. 2 liters of bleach and 50 grams of sulfur were added to the bowl. Charles then reached for the detergent, lifting it up to pour it into the bowl.

That's when he realized

The Downy was empty.

Charles turned to his right, only to see a puddle of detergent, currently being licked by a golden retriever.

AIR BUD!

He had had enough. Charles pulled his revolver out of his pocket and shot 80 rounds of .55 mm ammunition into Air Bud's left eardrum. When the chaos dissipated, Charles looked down to find 80 rounds of .55 mm ammunition in his chest.

Charles cursed many a plague on all 7 of his own houses. How could he have forgotten that attacking twice in a row breaks a fundamental rule of Scrabble? (that's what we at Harvard call a rhetorical question btw so I better not see any reviews that answer this question don't answer it) If a player attacks twice in a row during a game of Scrabble, the attack is deflected and instead dealt to the attacker. It was a good thing that Charles wore his Kevlar vest on Tuesdays.

Rosebud: I sense that you are cursing many plagues on a variety of houses

Rosebud: What happened?

Billy: Air Bud

Billy: That's what happened

Rosebud: I see

Rosebud: So I guess you should get some detergent

Billy: Yep

Billy: You know where I can get some?

Rosebud: Well… yes

Rosebud: But you wont like it

Billy: ?

Billy: Oh

Billy: Oh No

Billy: Don't tell me

Rosebud: Dom

Billy: That guy

Billy: Hes creepy though

Rosebud: Do you want the detergent or not?

Billy: ugh

Billy: Ok

Billy: Hope I still remember how to get into his house

Rosebud: Good luck

Rosebud: I gotta go

Billy: Secret business?

Rosebud: Sure

[deinitiate textual conversation]

It was time for Charles to suit up, if he was going to…

His shouse…

Charles grabbed his trusty crossbow. He was horrible at using it, but it was a requirement if he wanted to get into Dom's house. Charles fled from his home in the shining moonlight on his trusty unicycle named J.K. Rowling, named after his favorite author. He hen proceeded to fall flat on his face and get the wind handed to him by his own unicycle. He decided to just ditch the unicycle. Within a couple minutes, he stood before a daunting forest where Dom's house lied.

Now it was time for the hard part. Charles used the crossbow (equip with grappling hook) to grapple onto trees and navigate through the maze of a forest from above. Ahead of him, charels could see Dom's treehouse, protected by a gate that was less of a gate and more of a giant birdcage. The house looked nothing like your ordinary treehouse. It was a two floor house, basically like any other house, but bolted to the side of a great birch tree. The entrance had a rope elevator to go up and down the tree, and as was said before, the entire tree and house was enclosed in a giant bird cage.

The only way to open the bird cage was to send a hidden code to Dom via textual message. He had a new code every week, with some clue hidden somewhere in the forest, marked with a candle. Charles could see the faint light of flaming wax a few trees ahead, and hopped onto its branch with all the enthusiasm as a panther during a clearance sale.

Charles adjusted his sight to see the clue carved into the tree in front of him. It was a collection of 1s and 0s arranged in the shape of a can of tuna. Binary and a pictogram? Dom really stepped it up today..?!

Sdgdsfgh (sorry I dropped my cat on the keyboard)

Good thing Charles was fluent in java, php, and c#! Charles decoded the binary in no time, then combined it with the tuna can to create a code message. Charles then dropped down from the tree and stepped in front of the gate that locked the huge bird cage.

[initiate textual conversation]

Billy: It's time to tuna

[deinitiate textual converation]

After a few moments, the gate opened automatically. Charles stepped forward, then gazed at the fine establishment above him. A silhouette appeared in the window, then pulled out its cellular phone and initiated a textual conversation.

[initiate textual conversation]

Buddha: State your business

Billy: Hi Dom

Billy: Uh…

Billy: I need you to do me another solid

I WONDER WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT TUNE IN NEXT WEEK TIME FOR CHAPTER TRES


	3. Chapter 3: fuck you

So last time Charles got the wind handed to him by Air Bud and then he went to Dom's house to get some Downy ok now your all caught up

[initiate textual conersation]

Buddha: State your business

Billy: Hi Dom

Billy: Um…

Billy: I need you to do me another solid

Buddha: What now

Billy: Ok so I need

Charles ducked as a jug filled to the brim of detergent came flying through Dom's Window©. He picked it up, and the creepy silhouette gave Charles a thumbs up.

Buddha: Are we done here

Billy: Uh yeah

Billy Ok thx

[deinitiate textual conversation]

The gate reopened and Charles swifted out of it, eager to get away from this creepy dude. He had the Downy, and that's all that mattered.

Charles got home and set the Downy on his chemistry tableau. He measured the 5 cups of detergent nessesary for the serum, and poured it into the bowl. With a spork, Charles mixed the whole thing together while Air Bud watched with his stupid, punchable face. What was he doing while Charles was gone?(nother rhetorical q btw) Popping popcorn?

The serum was complete, and I realized I never explained what the turnip serum did. Anything you pour it on turns into a turnip, except the bowl. Yeah that's pretty much it

It was time for Charles to put it to the test. He poured on the chair and…

Nope

He poured it on Air Bud and… (please turn into a tunipr he thought)

Nope

Huh said Charles. Why wasn't it working? Charles took a long, hard look at it and…

KNIVES STARTED LAUNCHING OUT OF THE BOWL RIGHT AT HIM OH GOSH HE TOOK OFF HIS KEVLAR VEST OH NO THERE WAS BLOOD EVERYWHERE

Charles (for once in his life) looked at Air Bud for assistance, but he was just watching the whole thing play out while eating popcorn what the heck Air Bud!

Charles thought his last thought and Air Bud started to lick the blood off of his corpse as his life drifted away…

Geoffry read the front page of the newspaper. Looks like some kid got mutilated by knives. And though the news was rather sad, well he just had to laugh, because he saw the photograph. I mean did you see that dog in the pic?

Wait hold up. He was getting a textual message from his best friend.

[initiate textual conversation]

Rosebud; What's up Geoff?

B-Dawg: Nothin much

to be continuned


	4. Chapter 4: Faded memories (We're fucked)

Sergeant Pepper gazed out of the window as he pondered the crisis at hand. He had no idea why they put the effort into supplying the base with flameproof windows, because the only thing you could see out of the windows was bright yellow magma. The futuristic windows might have looked cool if this was like a moon base or something, but here it just seemed unnecessary.

Pepper took a seat and browsed the database his team had built for the last ten years. The database contained all of the enemy's abilities, personality traits, and every tragedy it had caused. It was always evolving, having a seemingly limitless array of powers. It was constantly gaining strength, **Y** et hiding in the shadows, as if it was afraid.

But why?

All the data Pepper's crew had assembled led them to believe that it was almost immortal, godlike. Why would it hide if it had no weakness? Is it all just a taunt, this monster toying with humanity, going easy on it when it could obliterate the entire planet in no time? Or did it have an Achilles heel?

Pepper doubted it. He noticed the empty space at the end of the database, and decided to leave a note.

[initiate note]

We're fucked.

[deinitiate note]

A notification popped up on his Apple II computer. It seemed that the genetic cloning experiment down in Laboratory B was going to start shortly. Pepper stood up from his chair, straightening his neck tie. He exited his office through the automatic door, and walked down the hall. He entered the elevator on the right wing of the hallway, and clicked the button that initiated a switch in the mechanics of **t** he elevator system that instructed it to descend to Floor 17, where Laboratory B was located.

Standing in the elevator as Pepper entered was Lieutenant Blake. He must have been on his way to Floor 26 to file some more paperwork.

"Blake." Pepper greeted, professionally.

"Pepper." Blake muttered, tiringly.

The constant hum of the elevator accompanied the awkward silence that followed. Pepper tried to get his mind off of the encounter by humming along to the optimistic elevator music he placed in every elevator to keep their mind off of things. Most of the music were Beatles songs, which Pepper seemed to have an unconditional love for.

The elevator doors released to reveal Floor 17. It looked just as blank and empty as the rest of the floors, and without the LED sign that read "17", Pepper would have thought it was Floor 5.

Pepper stepped out of the elevator and walked down the left hall, making the second right and a direct left, then doing a U-turn and staying right, then flashing his turn signal to make the second left, then passing by the Chick-fil-A drive thru and getting an order of waffle fries with extra spaghetti sauce, then finally arriving at Laboratory B.

It looked like Professor Willow had been waiting for him. "Sergeant," he started. "I'm so glad you took time out of your schedule to join me for this experiment."

"No problem." Pepper replied. "I'd love to see us progress to the next ph **a** se of our operation. Are we starting now?"

"Yes, in just a few minutes." Willow stepped over to a control panel and pressed a few buttons, causing a massive container to rise up from the floor. "I just need to make some final preparations, and we should be good to go."

Pepper approached the cylindrical container and stared at the precious cargo it contained.

The Air Buddies.

The Buddies were an elite force cloned from the great Air Bud himself. They were responsible for gathering most of the data they had in the database. Unfortunately, they and some of their assistants were nearing the end of their life, and have been in cryogenic sleep for a few years. The crew was saving them in order to use their genetic material to create an all new force that would initiate Phase 3 of their operation, and hopefully put an end to all this chaos.

"And, we're clear. Are you ready?" Professor Willow addressed Pepper.

"Go for it." Pepper replied.

Willow hesitated for a moment, then pulled a large lever to initiate the DNA splicing process. Each of the buddies and their friends were mixed with human gametes taken from humans with some of the best genes. This would hopefully result in the creation of several human fetuses, each with specially designed traits and instincts inherited from the Air Buddies.

The splicing began, and the entire Laboratory began to shake. Vials plummeted off of shelves, shattering on the floor. Electric sparks flew off of the container, and Pepper gazed at the experimen **t** underway in awe…

Spencer awoke groggily. He had the wildest dream, something about cloning? He turned to face his alarm clock, to find that it was only 2:00 in the morning. Spencer still had an entire Saturday ahead of him, so he decided to rest his head on the pillow and drift back into the world of dreams…

Sergeant Pepper gazed at the monitor before him. The agents were making quick process, and Pepper started to feel optimistic that the operation would be a success. But he knew he couldn't jump to conclusions this early into Phase 3.

A notification popped up on the monitor.

MEETING WITH AGENT – LOBBY 5

Pepper had almost forgotten. He had scheduled a meeting with a field agent to discuss the plans for progress into Phase 3. Pepper got up from his seat and left his office, making his way to the elevator down the hall.

As Pepper entered the elevator, he noticed Lieutenant Blake **z** tanding in the elevator as well. After pressing the button that directed the elevator to descend to the floor where Lobby 5 lied, he greeted Blake professionally.

"Blake."

"Pepper."

Pepper tapped his foot to the beat of "She's Leaving Home" as the hum of the elevator filled the confined room. Taking a risk, Pepper decided to attempt a normal, informal conversation with Blake.

"So, how are those reports comi-"

"Why don't you fuck off." Blake replied. "Norman."

Pepper decided to leave this attempt failed. He didn't blame Blake for his rudeness, though. It had been a stress filled week for everyone in the facility, so some aggression was expected.

The elevator arrived at the floor where Lobby 5 lied, and Pepper exited out of the automatic door. He entered the room directly to his left, labeled "Lobby 5", and poured a cup of coffee as he waited for the agent. He mixed in the half and half and took a cautious sip, before literally lighting his tongue on fire and he nearly died if it weren't for the stash of flour tortillas he left in his right hand pocket, used for fire extinguishing. Oh hey there's the agent

"Abigail." Pepper greeted professionally.

"Pepper." Abigail replied.

"Status report."

"Pretty uneventful recently." Abigail took a seat at the nearby table. "I did what you asked, and got the rest of the crew to use their genetic code names as screennames on the message application **q**."

"Good." Pepper replied. "This way, the chance of the enemy tracking your textual conversations will be at a minimum."

"So," Abigail started. "what's next in the plan?"

Pepper rested his hands on the table. "We're currently in the process of creating an ultra-dimensional portal to access other dimensions. Our readings show a possible weakness of the enemy located there. In terms of your work, just keep an eye on Agent Billy. The enemy seems to be drawn specifically to **H** im, and I worry that it will cause another disaster."

"On it." Abigail replied.

Pepper got up from his seat and pushed in his chair. "That is all. I expect another report in a few months. You are dismiss-"

Alarms blared throughout the facility. A bright red notification popped up on Pepper's cellular telephone:

ALERT! REPORT TO OFFICE! ALERT! WE'RE FUCKED! ALERT!

Pepper and Abigail rushed to the stairs, sprinting up the mountain of steps until they reached Floor 1 of the facility. Pepper swifted through the automatic door that led to his office and gazed upon his monitor in horror.

Displayed on the screen was a body of a ten-year old boy covered in blood, with his head smashed through a television screen, glass coating the floor.

Agent Wolf.

Status: Deceased.

And of course, sitting by the bloodied corpse, was the enemy. An animal with golden fur, and one paw resting on a golden, twisted metal baseball bat…

Debra awoke with a start, her room concealed in shadow. She turned to face her alarm clock to see that it was only 5:00 AM. Debra rested her head on her pillow, and drifted off, back into the world of dreams, rem **N** ants of memories long faded…

Sergeant Pepper slammed his fist on the table in response to the sight projected on his monitor. The deceased body of a fifteen-year-old boy lied on the floor, knives sticking out of his body, with red blood splattered across the room.

Agent Billy.

Status: Deceased.

And of course, sitting beside the bloodied corpse was the enemy.

"AUGH!" Pepper exclaimed as he swiped his coffee mug off of the desk, shattering it on the floor. He noticed the note he had written all those years ago in another window beside the footage of the recently deceased agent.

We're fucked.

"My thoughts exactly!" Pepper hollered.

"Calm down, Sergeant!" Abigail interfered. "You're acting like a maniac!"

Pepper sighed as he looked up to face Abigail. "I suppose it's not doing us any good."

"Anyways, why did you call me here in the first place?" Abigail asked.

Pepper looked down at the floor. "It's time. Time to initiate Operation B.U.D."

"Really!?" Abigail exclaimed.

"Yes, but don't get your hopes up. There's still a long road ahead of you all. We have finished constructing the portal, and now we need you to round up the team for briefing."

"So, we're really doin **g** this?"

Pepper nodded. "The portal has been tested, and is in excellent condition. Your task is to transport the rest of the agents here. You are dismissed."

"I'm on it, sir." Abigail said as she prepared to leave the office.

"We're relying on you." Pepper muttered as she left.

"Agent Rose **b** ud."

Rosebud exited the office as Pepper gathered his supplies. He supposed he should go down to Floor 34 to prepare the initiation of Operation B.U.D. Pepper left through the automatic door, and entered the elevator down the hall.

As Pepper entered the elevator and pressed the button the caused the elevator to descend to Floor 34, he noticed Lieutenant Blake standing in the elevator. Pepper prepared his best professional greeting to blast Blake away.

"Blake." Pepper greeted professionally.

"Pepper." Blake answered aggressively.

Pepper stood as the expected awkward silence played out. He gazed up at the fluorescent lights above him, and noticed them flickering. He was making a mental note to replace the bulbs when the lights suddenly went completely dark.

When the lights started flickering with light again, Blake was behind Pepper grasping a sharp, steel knife. He tried to thrust the blade into Pepper's flesh, but Pepper grabbed Blake's wrist, snapping it and causing him to drop the blade. Pepper then grabbed his pistol from his belt and fired a bullet straight into Blake's heart.

Blake's deceased corpse slid to the ground, his lifeless eyes facing down at the ground. Pepper stared at the LED sign that displayed the current floor, while humming along to the elevator music to keep his mind off of the corpse in the room.

"It's getting better all the time…"

Charles awoke from his dream, feeling strangely empty. What was Rosebud doing at some king of facility? **0**

It was then when Charles realized that he wasn't at home. The land that surrounded him was completely coated in green. Before him lied a massive tower, and the landscape was completely flat. And what was this strange feeling in his head? It was almost like someone was talking to him, but there was no one around.

[initiate telepathic conversation]

Wolf: Greetings.

Wolf: Welcome to Hell.

to be continuensnfend

SECRET HINT: watch?v= _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	5. Chapter 5: The most important chapter

.


	6. Chapter 6: The domination of a cheez-it

Spencer closed his bedroom door on a Saturday morning. The television shone bright in front of him, displaying a news broadcast reporting on a mysterious murder in his neighbor's house. Spencer grinned at the photo of the blood-soaked teenager, an array of knives sticking out of his torso. The scent of death was in the air, and Spencer found it acetounding.

It was then when Spencer's pants vibrated. That always happens to me every other week. It seemed the cause of the vibration was Spencer's cellular telephone. He must be getting an auditorial message. His phone did not support textual messages, of course.

[initiate auditorial conversation]

Rosebud: "Sup spenc"

Mudbud: "Is there ANY particular reason that YOU decided to spend VALUABLE TIME of my LIFE?"

Rosebud: "yee"

Rosebud: "I need you to turn on your teleporter."

Mudbud: "And why would I do THAT?"

Rosebud: "cuz"

Mudbud: "cuz"

Mudbud: "ARE YOU F***ING KIDDING ME!?"

Mudbud: "wait"

Mudbud: "F***?"

Mudbud: "OH G**D*** IT!"

Mudbud: "DON'T TELL ME YOU PUT A SWEAR FILTER ON!"

Rosebud: "¯\\_(ツ)_/¯"

Rosebud: "Maybe"

Mudbud: "F*** YOU"

Mudbud: "Guess who's NOT turning on their teleporter now?"

Mudbud: "THIS F***ING GUY!"

Rosebud: "Aw come on don't be like that"

Rosebud: "April fools?"

Mudbud has closed the phone application.

Rosebud: "Aw snap"

[deinitiate auditorial conversation]

Enough of that pile of trash. It's time to get down to business.

Spencer opened up his notebook, or as he called it, "El Escritorio Nocivo". It contained several blueprints of doomsday machines and world domination plans, many of which had failed. The biggest thing Spencer had dominated in his life was a single cheez-it, which he keeps in his closet as a kind of good luck token, or just a nostalgic piece of memorabilia.

Along with his nefarious schemes, one of Spencer's biggest hobbies was to play the accordion, which is known to be the most demonic instrument of all time. Just look at how it possesses such a dark aura…

Spencer was bored. He had already sent his homework to Geoff's homework machine to finish it for him, so he had nothing to do now. He decided to switch on the television and watch his favorite show, Skience Guyz.

Now we're talking. The Skience Guyz were a dynamic duo that did a bunch of stupid science things that were probably fake. But fake reality television is the most entertaining reality television. In this episode, the Skience Guyz were asked to help some garbage people to speed up their job. With the help of a teleporter, the Skience Guyz transported all the trash in the community dumpsters to a land fill in the span of a few seconds.

Apparently.

Well that was cool. But now it was time to get serious. Spencer booted up his Apple II computer and opened the steam machene applicatoion. He chose to play his favorite game Call of Duty Advanced Blops 4.7 Ultimate edition, featuring HTC vive support! He plugged in his htc vive and started shooting a bunch of peeps. Literally. He downloaded a mod that makes all the enimies peeps. Why? Who knows.

In CoDAB4.7UE,FHTCVS! , you play alongside a team of other players to shoot as many peeps as possible. Spencer was number 17 on the leaderboards because he was a cool guy. He used a .47 mm RCT2 automatic, the best automatic knife in the game. That's right, he was so cool that he didn't even use guns, instead preferring the cold blade of knives and other dirking devices.

After Spencer played on his HTC vive, he was reminded of his own knife collection which he treasured so much. He decided to open it up, for old time's sake.

The case opened with a satisfying click, revealing an array of blades. Some were ordinary, while others were crazy experiments created with the help of his friend, Charles. Where was Charles, anyway? Probably dead or something.

Oh yeah, spencer saw the news. Charles was dead. I forgot.

Spencer decided to carry the knife case with him. He may even need it soon…

Spencer remembered that he had opened up El Escritorio Nocivo and didn't even do anything with it. He looked back at it and saw a blueprint for an amazing weapon he had designed called the "Tape Shooter". It shoots tape.

Spencer needed something to waste the time, so he gathered the parts to build the Tape Shooter and brang all his materials to the roof to assemble it together.

After setting up the power supply, spencer used his wire cuters to slice all the wires off of the barrel of the tape shooter. The wires stop electricity, of course. He then set up the propulsion network to laucnch the tape throught the barrel, and then stood back to set it off.

3…2…go

Spencer pulled the button and….

Nothing happened .

Huh. Why didn't it work? Did he not cut all the wires? All That did happen was he could now hear a loud whooshing noise, but it seemed to be coming from behind him. He turned around to find nothing but open air.

Oh f***. Here she is again.

[initiate auditorial conversation]

Rosebud:"so"

Rosebud: "are you gonna turn on your teleporter?"

Mudbud: "NO"

Rosebud: "k"

Rosebud: "welp"

Rosebud: "sorry in advance"

[deinitiate auditorial conversation]

Sorry in advance? What?

Suddenly, the whooshing chopper turned off its invisibility filter and a guy on the side of the helicopter knocked spencer out with a golden crooked baseball bat. The chopper grabbed sopencer with a force field, then flew away as the invisibilty filter reactivated and the helicopter blended into the atmosphere.

To be continuhdfiuhidsuhgfijfiushrigfslijurfiurhfgusdufhvisv


	7. Chapter 7: Day of the accipitridae

Debra awoke groggily with the pecking of an eagle on her right shoulder. She arose and the eagle mounted on her shoulder as the sunlight seeped in through the window. A grin spread across her face, as she remembered that today was the big day. She excitedly hopped off of her mattress and fled through her bedroom door, the eagle in swift pursuit.

There it was. Lying atop a wreath of twigs and branches was an egg, as white as a pearl. Debra swiftly pulled her cellular telephone out of her pockets and tweeted about the brand new celebratory event #blessed. Debra had an irrational love for twitter, tweeting at least once every hour. All her friends followed her on twitter as well, save for a few (no one likes you spencer #lameGuy). She noticed, however, that one of her friends, Charles, went silent recently. The eagle hopped off her shoulder to rest atop the egg, and Debra moved on to the morning routine while they rested.

After getting dressed and feeding the eagle, Debra observed the landscape that lied outside her house. She lived on an expansive plain with broad hills stretching for miles, and yet she still got wifi from the government. She had no idea how, and didn't really care. Her humble abode was your stereotypical suburban house in the middle of nowhere, with a bedroom, a living room, and the bird room, where her eagle usually resided.

Speaking of Debra's eagle, she was her most loyal companion and best friend. Her name was Reosir, and she was about the same age as Debra, being with her for her entire life. Debra often went on expeditions outside with Reosir, and now that she thought of it, an expedition sounded like the perfect thing right now!

Unfortunatly, Reosir was sleeping. Debra woulod wake her up later, but for the time being, she decided to hang out around her house. One of Debra's favorite things to do was cooking, which was perfect since she lived alone with her eagle and had to cook all her meals her self. She decided to cook up one of the greatest delicacies she could make for breakfast, a lamb's eyeball. Debra retrieved a lamb's eye from her bag, used to hold supplies gathered by Reosir when she went hunting. Tossing it onto the frying pan, she stirred the eye around with a spatula while alos boiling a potato at the same time. She melted the cheese onto the potato, and placed the lamb's eye into the oven as she already pre-heated it to 700 degrees.

Debra left the kitchen while the lamb's eye heated up, deciding to explore around the house a bit more. Opening a small room to the side of the hall, she examined her many trophies for a variety of contests she had won over the years. She was quite proud of all her accomplishments, and a quick glance at these trophies always brightened up her day. She moved back into the kitchen, where OH GOSH THERE WAS A FIRE

Debra grabbed her mini portable fire extinguisher and sprayed in every direction to see a simmered down fire. She had to carry a fire extinguisher pretty much everywhere she went, as fires seemed to just gravitate towards her. The fire seemed to have woken up Reosir, so Debra decided now was a great time to go for a small expedition. Reosir fluttered onto Debra's shoulder, and she pushed the door ajar, breathing in the fresh spring air.

Hiking up the many hills of her home land, Debra felt truly alive. Spotting a lamb on the horizon, debra sent Reosir swooping down to murder it in cold blood. Reosir returned to Debra with two lamb eyes, and Debra pocketed the eyes into the pouch. The lamb, still alive, continued to bleed out until its soul slowly sank into the wavy grass.

Debra continued to move, not really wlaking but striding forward over the hills, when she felt a ringtone producing from her pocket. She grabbed her phone to see some snapchat direct messages from Abigail.

[initiate snapchatual conversation]

Rosebud: Hi

Belinda: Yo

Rosebud: So

Rosebud: You can like fly or whatever with your eagle right

Belinda: Yep!

Rosebud: Ok, so can you come to these exact coordinates posted below?

Rosebud: (insert coordinates)

Belinda: Um…

Belinda: Why though?

Rosebud: Ugh

Rosebud: Its classified

Belinda: Hmm…

Rosebud: What if I told you that I hid a geocache here

Belinda: Sure!

Belinda: I'll be there right away

Rosebud: cool

[deinitiate snapchatual converation]

Debra loved geocaching. It combined treasuring hunting with nature, two of debras favorite things. Debra's many favorite things. Debra loved adventure in general, as it broke the mundane bores of everyday life. Debra always looked for something more, beyond reality, a world of imagination. She sighed, knowing htat she was trapped in the rules of real life.

Well whatever. Debra retrieved the egg from her house, ready to take it on its first adventure, and grabbed on to Reosir's sharp talons. Reosir flapped her wings, using all 7 of her gigawatts to rise above the ground, Debra in tow. Debra used her phone as a global positioning satellite in order to guide Reosir to the coordinates. Reosir flew on route to the coordinates, which unbeknownst to Debra, led to an elevator that led to the core of the earth oh shoot I just spoiled chapter 13

To be continuhued


	8. Chapter 8 (get it like ate): Vore blagur

Josh swiveled his chair to face his desk and slammed his computer mouse with a triumphant click. He sat back in his chair and watched as his newest fiction uploaded to the interwebs.

Josh was an amateur writer in the art of fanfiction. You may have even heard of some of his famous works. His pen name was GReceiverVoreGuy, and using a little known golden retriever as inspiration, Josh had created beautiful works of art.

Yes, his fanfiction dot net username did include vore in it, and that is because vore is awesome. To be specific, Josh wrote vore fiction based on the dog that always seemed to creep around him and his group of friends, Air Bud. Air Bud's luscious golden fur provided the perfect canvas for Josh to create his masterpieces.

Oh hey there he is now. Air Bud slowly shuffled through the door of Josh's bedroom and sniffed the open air. It appeared he was looking for something, and was quite agitated at his failed attempts of location. Josh admired Air Bud for his amazing potential as a predator, and he didn't really care if everyone else saw that as extremely creepy. He usually kept his work exclusive to those closest to him, like his friend Don.

Oh hey what do you know Don seems to be messaging Josh as we speak!

[initiate textual convoresation]

Sniffer:what's up

Budderball: just hangin out

Budderball: Air Buds here too

Sniffer: oh

Sniffer: sorry it's just

Sniffer: that dog is kinda creepy

Budderball: what no way he's great

Sniffer: idk

Sniffer: I got a message from Abigail

Budderball: who?

Sniffer: rosebud

Budderball: oh yeah

Sniffer: she wants me to use my teleporter to go to some random coordinates so we may not be able to hang out this afternoon

Budderball: dang it

Budderball : welp

Budderball: just call me when you're done with whatever she wants

Sniffer: k

Sniffer: see you later

Budderball: bye

[deinitiate textual convoresation]

Josh decided to stop joshing around and get down to biznezzzz

You see, Josh is a master artist, a maestro of words and images that cannot be matched by anyone in the academy of cool peeps, which is where Josh gets all of his education. Josh uses his incredible artistic skillz to make all things vore: paintings, stories, movies, video games, claymation, pretty much every type of media you can think of, even music somehow. Vore truly was his passion, and that's why everybody hates him. But he doesn't really care all that much, because a small group of people didn't hate him, and they just so happened to be his friends. Charles was kind of weirded out by the whole thing, which was understandable, Spencer informed him repeatedly that vore is the second largest reason why he wanted to stab Josh in the eye sockets, and Sniffer actually kind of liked it, almost seeming jealous of it.

Josh was super outgoing, so having his passion only being accepted by a small group of people was tough sometimes. But he got by with a little help from his friends.

Oh shoot I forgot I said it was time to get down to businesses

So Josh began to logon to his account and check the comments on his latest bit of art work. It was a vore art of air bud, and one of Josh's best works.

[initiate comments]

Mudbud: FUCK

Mudbud: THIS

Sniffer: Wow, Josh, great work, keep it up, I'm proud of you

Mudbud: SHIT

Billy: wow so much negative vibes in here

Mudbud: charles

Mudbud: Someday YOU are going to be MUTILATED by exactly SEVENTEEN DIRKING DEVICES and I am going to LAUGH AT YOUR UNBEARABLE PAIN AS YOU SUFFER IN A POOL OF YOUR OWN BLOOD

Billy: geez

Rosebud: let's all calm down

Rosebud: and enjoy

Mudbud: NO

Mudbud: DONT SAY IT

Rosebud: some of...

Rosebud: Martíns famous tortilla soup!

Mudbud: FUCK YOU

[deinitiate comments]

Josh grinned at the entertaining exchange of words that occurred in the comments. Seeing all of his friends as a group as they struggle to get along was awesome. In fact, Josh could see him and his friends go on a super awesome quest together, maybe spanning different planets or universes or polyverses! What even is a polyverse anyway, Josh thought. Do they even exist? What would they be like? This is how Josh's creative spindles spun, weaving the wonderful tapestry of imagination. Without his creative mind, Josh thought to himself, this wouldn't be a life worth living anymore. He would kill himself out of jealous envy, rage directed towards certain people that may or may not be plotting to jounce a limb that he may or may not be standing on!

Oh gosh I got off track huh. That was one downside to Josh's imagination. He often got carried away in his own thoughts, leading to him losing track of time and having what others would consider a lack of focus when in reality it was simply a shift of focus. He often felt insecure about hogging all of the time to himself, rambling on and on to his friends instead of giving them a chance to speak. He took so much time talking and making stupid vore art that he lacked the ability to listen.

Suddenly, the roly poly like vibration of his cellular telephone snapped him out of his angsty train of thought. It seemed to be his friend Abigail. He hoped that a conversation with her would help him relax this emotional wreck he was going through recently.

[initiate textual convoresation]

Rosebud: yo

Budderball: oye

Rosebud: so is there any way for you to get to these coordinates (just pretend there are coordinates here okay)

Budderball: i could take an uber there

Budderball: like a self driving uber

Budderball: I'm not driving with some random guy to mysterious coordinates

Budderball: have you ever tried one of those ubers

Budderball: I used it once and it was kinda awkward soooo yeah

Budderball: but these self driving car ones look pretty cool

Budderball: I hope they can drive off the road, assuming the coordinates you sent me aren't on the side of a road you kno-

Rosebud: just shut up alright I don't have all day dude

Budderball: geez okay

Rosebud: just get there somehow and a whole lot of stuff will be explained okay

Budderball: is this the same thing Sniffers doing?

Rosebud: yes

Rosebud: all of our friends are going to be here including you

Budderball: can I bring Air bud?

Rosebud: NO

Rosebud: OH GOSH NO

Budderball: alright alright

Rosebud: thanks

Rosebud remember this is all top secret so make sure no one sees you in your self driving uber or whatever okay?

Budderball: okay

Rosebud: alright see you later

[deinititate textual convoresation]

Josh sighed. He knew he was always hogging up everybody's time. He gave a brick to Airbud, because he had spent enough time with him to know that he loved to break stuff. He also turned off the sink faucet. He always left it on accidentally, and he took up 90% of all water usage in his apartment. Also, he grabbed a small black box from his desk before he left. Just in case.

Stepping down the stairs from his apartment, he called a self driving car and gazed into the sky as it speeded along, his eyes piercing into the void and the polyverses beyond.


	9. Chapter 9: Electrostigma perezoso

With the flip of the light switch, Geoff's greenhouse shined full of white light. He placed the seed that he had spent all night building into a pot full of nuts and bolts, sprinkling it with a pinch of gasoline. The gears on the seed started to turn with a click, and slowly germinated out of the metal casing. Geoff sat down on a nearby chair, observing the room filled with robotic plants. He cracked open a newspaper and viewed the front page:

[initiate newspaperiol clipping]

BREAKING MEWS!

KID FOUND MUTALATED TO DEATH WITH A BUNCH OF DIRKING DEVICES IN HIS OWN HOME

Last Friday evening, 15 year old Charles Lecinstien was found dead in his own home. He apparently lived only with his pet dog, Air Bud, the same dog who took the world by storm with his amazing basketball skills. Air Bud was found next to Charles body, consuming the hemoglobin in his red blood cells. A suspect to the murder is no where to be found where could he be. See you guys later on channel fuck me news same bat time same bat channel

[deinitiate newspaperiol clipping]

Below the gripping news story was a photograph of the crime scene. The combination of the derpy looking dog and the blood was for some horrible reason hilarious to Geoff, and he let out a hearty laugh.

Oh hey rosebud is calling or messaging I really don't know at this point

[initiate textual conversation]

Rosebud: sup Geoff

B-Dawg: nothin much

B-Dawg: taking care of my plants

B-Dawg: chillin

Rosebud: so your not busy or anything?

B-Dawg: I mean

B-Dawg: It takes a lot of time to harvest metallic plants

B-Dawg: and also I always have new inventions to invent and grinds to soap

Rosebud: I classify that as not very busy

Rosebud: I need you to soap your way over to these coords

(Insert coordinates lol?)

B-Dawg: yeah sweet I'll put that into my busy schedule

Rosebud: ugh ok but pls hurry

B-Dawg: aight

Rosebud: see you later

B-Dawg: aight

[deinitiate textual conversation]

Even though Geoff said that he was going to go over there, he decided to chill for a bit more. There's probably plenty of time.

The greenhouse was where Geoff spent most of his time. Geoff was a master of Robotany, the study of robotic plants. He studied the art since grade school, inspired by some of the greatest robotanists in history like Neil deGrasse Tyson. His report on how motorized roses bloom was absolutely mind boggling.

Many see Robotany as a complete waste of time, but Geoff respectfully disagreed. The calm tranquillity one gets from sitting in a sea of whirring gears and grinding steel is unmatched by any other study. Some people even tried to outlaw Robotany, as it contributed to 18% of all greenhouse gases, but Geoff saw the good stuff beyond the gas. I mean everyone knows we're all going to die from global warming eventually, so why not enjoy life with some good old robotic plants am I right.

Geoff reached into his bag and retrieved a handful of cheddar cheese colored metal pods, sprinkling them into the artificial soil below him. Grabbing his gasoline can, he poured a good amount of petroleum onto the seeds and watched as they slowly started to germinate. The cool thing about Robotany is that it's way faster to grow robotic plants than real ones. Geoff got on his feet and called it a day, stepping out of his greenhouse.

Geoff examined around his bedroom, looking for supplies which he may need for the journey to the weird coordinates that Abigail send him. He of course had to bring his Chex mix, his most prized possession. Not only is it a great nutritional snack, but it had a strong emotional bond with Geoof. Ever since the incident that killed his parents, Chex mix had always been there for him.

Watching...

Geoff grabbed the Chex Mix and looked for more double stuff. He noticed a pair of yellow sneakers, with some wires and metal plates on the bottom of the heels. This of course were his trusty pair of soaps, shoes that allow you to grind on rails. The wires were part of a project to upgrade the shoes, which was still just a prototype. He slipped into them, tightening the Velcro straps because Velcro is cool. Also Geoff didn't know how to tie shoes and he was very insecure about it.

Geoff would need his soaps to make it to rosebud in a jiffy. Speaking of jiffy, he also grabbed his jif peanut butter just in case air bud was there. He loved peanut butter.

Yeah, Geoff knew Air Bud. Pretty much everyone in his group of friends knew about him, seeing as how he always stalked everybody. Also the whole murder thing in the news and also he is a sports sensation. After all the street cred he got in the sport biz, he just disappeared and started stalking Charles and the rest of the gang. Nobody knew what was up with that dog.

Geoff was about ready to zip zappity on out of here oh hey it's rosebud

[initiate textual conversation]

Rosebud: Where the frick are you?

B-Dawg: on my way

Rosebud: get off your ass and hurry up

Rosebud: we don't have much time!

B-Dawg: aight aight I'm coming

[deinitiate textual conversation]

Geoff often felt like the work he did was ignored by his friends, that he was just a lazy slob. But he would prove to them that he could do much more.

Geoff stepped outside his house, breathing in the fresh Maine air. Starting with a sprint, he launched onto a barrier sitting at the edge of a highway bridge. He started grinding on that barrier, sparks flying every which way, and he gazed into the setting sun as he accelerated towards the mysterious coordinates.


	10. Chapter 10: the shellfish meme (pt 1)

The girl set her phone on the bed beside her, and she sat, waiting. Something big was about to happen, about to change the world and potentially save it. The last hope for humanity was about to save us all. So why was she so worried? She had waited years for this moment, but now that it was happening, she was stressed out of her mind. Maybe it was because she knew the truth. Or maybe..

Rosebud: what?

Huh?

Rosebud: are you talking about me?

Oh, I gotta go.


	11. Chapter 11: To an artist dying young

Well, that was awkward...

Um...

Let's just skip her for now, ok?

Now who's next?

Ah yes, I remember now. Let me set the scene:

A boy gazes intently into his computer screen, absorbing every individual pixel with his dark green eyes. The boy brushes aside his hair and starts to furiously tap the backspace button on his keyboard, gradually crumbling all the hard work he had done in the word document before him. He is once again greeted by a white screen, an empty canvas, what was once a fountain of possibilities now a dead end to a cold road of creation. The boy slams his fists into the desk, breathing heavily in out in out from his mouth, he starts to hyperventilate as he leans back in his chair and it gives out behind him with a creeeeaaakkk

The boy falls on his back, pain shooting out from his neck. He stumbles to his feet, as he feels a soft vibration from his pocket. He reaches into his pocket, retrieving his Mobile phone where someone had been messaging him. With a tap, he initiated a conversation.

[initiate textual conversation]

Rosebud: Hello

Rosebud: Don

Rosebud: is... Everything ok?

Sniffer: yep

Sniffer: everything's fine

Rosebud: ok well

Rosebud: I need you for one of my projects

Rosebud: you know me

Sniffer: um

Sniffer: right now?

Rosebud: yeah

Sniffer: what do you need me to do?

Rosebud: just use your teleporter to go to these coordinates (insert some coords here aight I don't have all day)

Rosebud: I'll explain everything to you there

Sniffer: um

Sniffer: ok

Rosebud: and Don

Rosebud: please take care of yourself

Sniffer: I'm FINE

Rosebud: ok

Rosebud: I guess I'll see you soon

Sniffer: sure

[deinitiate textual conversation]

Don looked around his messy room. He didn't even know where his teleporter was now. The floor was covered with ideas that have rotted over the years. Don had dabbled in everything: drawings, music, poetry, creative writing, interpretive dance, underwater basket weaving, you name it. He had always wanted to be an artist, being inspired by many of his friends. Josh's amazing vore art was always something Don wanted to live up to.

Oh shit, though Don, I had plans to hang out with Josh this afternoon. It seems they would have to cancel their meeting due to Abigail's project. He should probably message him. Don opened the message application and started a conversation.

[initiate textual convoresation]

Sniffer:what's up

Budderball: just hangin out

Budderball: Air Buds here too

Sniffer: oh

Sniffer: sorry it's just

Sniffer: that dog is kinda creepy

Budderball: what no way he's great

Sniffer: idk

Sniffer: I got a message from Abigail

Budderball: who?

Sniffer: rosebud

Budderball: oh yeah

Sniffer: she wants me to use my teleporter to go to some random coordinates so we may not be able to hang out this afternoon

Budderball: dang it

Budderball : welp

Budderball: just call me when you're done with whatever she wants

Sniffer: k

Sniffer: see you later

Budderball: bye

[deinitiate textual convoresation]

Don put his phone back in his pocket with a sigh. He hated to disappoint him with this news. Remember when I said Josh's vore art was something Don always wanted to live up to? Well that's the problem: he never could live up to it. No matter what Don did, someone else did it better. He couldn't do anything right, but he had to try right. Who knows. Maybe he should just give up now. He always could. Stumbling over to the nightstand, reaching to open the drawer, he retrieved the gun from inside. All it would take is just one twitch of a finger and all of it would be over. Sniffer pointed it into his mouth. Closing his eyes, Don pulled the trigger.

Then Don almost choked on a foam dart. It was a nerf gun. Sniffer coughed up the dart and set aside the gun, lying on the ground among his broken ideas. Shivering in the cold, Don touched his face with his hand, a reminder of his injury. Due to an incident Don did not want to discuss, he had no nose, only a lifeless stump. He had no sensation of scent, and was embarrassed about it. In fact he wants me to stop talking about it and for respect to him I think I will.

Sniffer picked up the nerf gun and brushed some of the scraps of paper from the floor to reveal a green, glowing platform. Don tapped a few buttons and it lit up, ready to take Sniffer to his destination. With a sigh Don stepped in.

A cold somber look

His atoms separated

Into the unknown


	12. Chapter 12: the shellfish meme (pt 2)

Ok, so we've introduced Charles, Pepper, Spencer, Debra, Josh, Geoff, and Don. That just leaves...

Rosebud: me?

Oh.

Ok, so you probably have no idea what is happening. Basically I'm just trying to do my job of checking each character off of my little checklist here and in the process Abigail here decided to break the fourth wall and this is a big problem.

Rosebud: what wall?

Oh, uhh nothing

Rosebud: you have quite a bit of explaining to do

Just tell us a bit about yourself

Rosebud: who's us? Who are you?

Please, introduce yourself.

Rosebud: my name is Abigail

Rosebud: is that all you want?

Give us your whole life story here

Rosebud: no

Rosebud: fuck no

Excuse me?

Rosebud: I'm not going to answer any of your question until you answer mine.

Rosebud: Who

Rosebud: the fuck

Rosebud: are you

That will come later Abigail

Right now I just need you to tell me about you.

Rosebud: I'VE LIVED IN A FUCKING CELL IN A GOVERNMENT FACILITY LYING IN THE CENTER OF THE EARTH FOR 15 FUCKING YEARS WATCHING ALL MY FRIENDS THROUGH CAMERAS WAITING FOR WHEN WE GET TO KILL A FUCKING PSYCHOTIC MAGIC DOG!

Rosebud: IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT YOU LITTLE FUCKER?

That's perfect Abigail

Now we can move on.

Rosebud: OH NO YOU DONT YOU LITTLE PRICK!

Rosebud: NOT UNTIL YOU GIVE ME SOME FUCKING ANSWE-

Oh, sorry, we're you still listening to her? I just hit the mute button so we didn't have to hear her anymore.

Now, who's next?


	13. Chapter 13: An addictive prophecy

Dominic opened his eyes wide, glancing at the perilous fall below him. The wind swept by his face, as if he was moving at the speed of light. In fact he probably was, but he wasn't for sure. Dom was standing on top of an airship blimp thing, and a blurry shadow was standing before him. This was typical in his dreams, the details were not always clear. He was grasping a sharp steel sword, and the shadow dashed towards him. He desperately tried to summon his hamon energy through the sword but it didn't work and he died.

Then Dominic woke up. It was about noon, and Dom was just finishing up his first prophetic nap of the day. His training was long and hard, but his vision was getting clearer. Dominic sat up in his bed, swinging his legs off of the mattress and walking into the bathroom.

He then proceeded to masturbate and I decided to respect his privacy and skip this part.

After getting dressed, Dom decided to look around his room. It was quite messy, so inspecting some of the things he didn't usually pay attention to could help. The bedroom and bathroom made up the entirety of Dom's treehouse, with a large birdcage guarding his humble abode from any possible intruders. It also kinda left him disconnected from his friends and the outside world, but that kind of stuff wasn't really important to him. Dom spent most of his time training his vision.

Speaking of which, Dom decided to get a good breakfast before continuing the rest of the day. Reaching into his pocket, he retrieved a bundle of carrots. After eating all five of the carrots, Dom made a mental note to get more from his garden where he grew carrots cauliflower and mushrooms. That's about all he ate, and it probably wasn't very nutritious but like he stated earlier, Dom really didn't care.

Directly in front of Dom's bed was an old television with a smashed screen. This was one of the tools Dom used to extend his vision. He bought it from a really spooky garage sale run by an old man who said that strange stuff happened when he used it. Not much happened to Dom, except of course the voices.

Dom could hear voices from the television. Or at least, one voice. It was very faint, but he could make out words sometimes. After the daily presentation of the star spangled banner every night, Dom, would listen to the static and try to make out the voices. Also, the tv would glitch out a lot around this time and switch between channels to form messages. It was pretty spooky. After a few years of living with the television, he had gathered enough information to piece together that the voice was a boy named Wolf. Dom assumed that wasn't actually his name, but that was what he called himself at least. Dom theorized that Wolf was some sort of spirit or something, but he wasn't for sure.

Wolf wasn't the only supernatural thing Dom dealt with, however. He would often get visions of another being by the name of Buddha. No, not the religious guy. It was actually a dog. Don't ask.

Dom would often have conversations with Buddha, and they were mostly awful because Dom thought Buddha was an awful person. However, whether he liked it or not, Dom couldn't deny that Buddha help him improve his vision with his cryptic prophecies and what not. Dom also noticed that his friend Abigail assigned him with his screenname, which also happened to be Buddha. Pretty spooky if you ask me.

Dom dedicated his life to understanding the human mind and predicting the future. He would forever strive to perfect his perception and transcend human sight. At least that's what he told himself. He had gotten better though, being able to predict most events a few seconds before they occoured. Not nearly close enough to omniscience, but he was pretty proud of it.

Dom's phone began to buzz like a crazy caterpillar on a Tuesday afternoon. Picking it up, he saw that it was a textual message from Abigail.

[initiate textual conversation]

Rosebud: Hey Dom

Rosebud: What's cookin

Buddha: Let me guess.

Buddha: You want me to go to some mysterious coordinates that will lead to a secret government facility that happens to lie in the core of the earth so we can neutralize Air Bud.

Rosebud: uh

Rosebud: Yeah pretty much.

Buddha: I'll be there.

Rosebud: K see you

[deinitiate textual conversation]

Dominic closed the message application on his cellular telephone. It was time to go. As Dom dashed down his rope ladder, something sticky collapsed ontop of him. Glancing up, he found a pile of garbage. Dom was sure this was not his garbage. Shrugging it off, he brushed aside the pile with his foot, exposing a shiny, crimson key lying at the bottom of the pile. Dom gave the key only a quick glance, but he suddenly couldn't take his eyes off of it. Stooping down, Dom retrieved the key, placing it in his pocket. It would be a shame to let such a beautiful key go to waste.

Unlocking his bird cage, Dom stepped out in to the spooky forest, and shuffled towards the government facility in the core of the earth.


	14. Chapter 14: Codename: BUD

Abigail awoke in a panic, her breaths fast and short. Her pupils dilated as they adjusted to the buzzing, fluorescent light bulbs in her room. The room was empty and metallic, looking no different than the rest of the facility. Abigail sighed in relief, realizing that the whole emotional breakdown she went through didn't actually happen and we can all move past it.

But Abigail then realized that it should be morning, which means her friends may have finally arrived! She excitedly jumped out of bed and exited the room.

Walking over to the elevator in the middle of the hall, she entered the room and pressed the button labeled 1 with a click. The floor numbers go down the closer they are to the surface, you see. And then Abigail took a nap because it takes like 17 hours to get from the core of the earth to the crust. The facility had very poor design.

As she waited, she noticed a splash of what looked like red paint on the wall. Investigating it further, she found it was actually Blood! Something suspicious happened in here, and Abigail was going to find out. Abigail was chosen as the one operation BUD agent to coordinate and lead the rest of the team due to her stealth, recon, and overall skill. When she starts a mission, she doesn't stop until it's complete.

17 hours later, the elevator doors opened shut and Abigail stepped out into the field outside. As if on cue, Geoff landed with a crazy double backflip pirouette combo as Debra landed next to him, eagle in tow. Don was the next to arrive, materializing out of thin air, as Josh stepped out of his driverless uber and watched the car return to the road. Dom also arrived, walking into view.

[initiate auditorial conversation]

Abigail: sup guys

Geoff: what up

Josh: hey

Don: hi

Debra: hello

Dom: greetings

Abigail: are we missing anybody?

Suddenly, the chopper that had been sitting there turned off its invisibility and dropped Spencer on the ground with a thud. He got to his feet, giving all of his friends the middle finger.

Spencer: you guys are the WORST friends EVER

Spencer: OF ALL TIME

Spencer: FUCK ALL OF YOU

Abigail: alright, now that everybody's here, we can get started.

Debra: what are we doing?

Abigail: just follow me into the elevator, and we'll explain inside.

With confused looks, everybody stepped into the elevator, except for Spencer, who had to be dragged in by Josh.

Abigail hit the button labeled 15, and the elevator shot down.

Spencer: Where the FUCK are we even going?

Abigail: this is where I live.

Josh: you'd think with us being friends and all we'd meet up more often

Spencer: I would LOVE to AVOID any possible time spent with YOU

Don: so, you live underground?

Don: that's pretty cool

Debra: don't you ever get outside?

Abigail: *shrug* sometimes

Abigail: also, we should all find a place to sleep

Abigail: it's a long way down

Suddenly, Dominic collapsed. That's what happens when you walk like 27 miles straight I suppose.

Everybody took their places and rested while they traveled toward the center of the earth. In the morning, they groggily woke up to see the elevator doors open shut.

Spencer: FINALLY

Abigail: shut up

They exited the small room, and walked into a larger conference room. Each of them took a seat and scooted up towards the long table in the center of the room. Abigail took her position, standing next to the chair on the end of the table. The chair swiveled around to reveal Sgt. Pepper sitting, his hands in that cool delta illuminati stance.

Josh: are you Abigail's father or

Pepper: I am an acquaintance of hers

Pepper: you probably don't remember me, so allow me to introduce myself.

Pepper: I am Sgt. Pepper. I have been watching you for some time now.

The group glanced at each other, dazed and confused. Pepper stood up and sighed.

Pepper: I'm going to put this bluntly.

Pepper: You all are not normal kids.

Pepper: You do not have parents.

Pepper: You are clones of the Air Buddies.

Spencer: WHAT

Spencer: THE

Spencer: FUCK

Pepper: Let me start from the beginning.

Pepper: I'm sure you are all aware of Air Bud, yes?

Pepper: The spectacular sports loving golden retriever.

Pepper: We have been watching him for some time, and noticed suspicious behavior. He is singlehandedly responsible for many deaths, and just recently caused one of our agents to go rogue and almost murder me.

Pepper: What if I told you that Air Bud is a supernatural being? That there are other universes out there, which may have been his origin?

Josh: I would think you spend too much time watching conspiracy videos.

Pepper: Would you like to see?

With a flip of a switch, a screen behind Pepper started to display a crudely recorded video of Air Bud demolishing a gas station by shooting a ray of yellow energy from his eyes.

Pepper: This recording was shot by our special agent operatives, the Air Buddies. They recorded most of the information we have now of Air Bud. The group consisted of a group of animals that claimed to be of Air Bud's same race, sent to kill him. Their names were Billy, Rosebud, Budderball, Sniffer, Wolf, Mudbud, Belinda, B-Dawg, and Buddha.

The group was shocked by the sound of these names, especially Dominic.

Pepper: You have probably pieced together that these names are your screen names on the message application. These names are used for you as screen names in order to hide your identity from others. Also, you all are clones of the Buddy that you are screen named after.

Pepper: When the buds grew old and neared death, we decide to splice their Dna with human embryos. This set into motion phase 3 of operation bud. We have gathered enough information about Air Bud through Air Buddy Surveillance, and now know some weaknesses of the devil. That's how you came about. You are phase 3, and your mission is to kill Air Bud.

The room grew quiet from this shocking revelation, but was then interrupted by the cries of Josh.

Josh: NO!

Josh: NOT AIRBUD!

Josh; HE WAS TOO YOUNG

Pepper calm yourself

Josh: *sob*

Pepper: anyways, your mission starts tomorrow, where you are going to be extracting an important object from the hands of Air Bud.

Pepper pulled down a projecter like screen that displayed a spherical stone with a yellow tint to it.

Pepper: while surveying Air Bud, we noticed that he always carried this around. Our scans showed that it contained a lot of concentrated power, able to cause great destruction, as you saw in the video.

Pepper: Tomorrow, you will go to Charles' house and take it from him to stop him from future potential attacks.

Everybody looked at each other blankly, then turned back to Pepper.

Dom: Yeah sure

Pepper: That's it

Pepper: you do realize I just told you that you were clones of dogs right

Debra: makes sense

Debra: I mean my government issued wifi had to come from somewhere, so I just assumed it was the earths core.

Abigail : that was easier than expected

Josh: I still don't want to kill AirBud though

Josh: He's the perfect predator

Don: Don't worry Josh, I'm sure we could just tranquilize him or something

Pepper: yeah...

Spencer: WHAT

Spencer: THE

Spencer: FUCK

Abigail: Are you shocked, or are you just being Spencer again?

Spencer: just

Spencer: NEVER SPEAK TO ME AGAIN

Pepper: Well, now that everybody is cool and we all know what's hip and happening, I'll give you a short tour of the facility as I walk you to your rooms.

Pepper led the way as everybody filed out of the conference room. They all entered the elevator, going down to floor 27. Exiting the elevator, the group passed by a large portal looking mechanism being operated by a guy with white hair in a lab coat.

Pepper: I'd like you all to meet Professor Willow

Pepper: He works at the tech department here on Floor 27, which is also the floor where your bedrooms reside.

The guy in the lab coat stumbled to his feet and greeted the crew.

Willow: Hello

Willow: um

Willow: I don't really know what to say

Josh: wait a sec

Josh your name is Professor Willow?

Josh: aren't you that guy in Pokemon GO?

Willow: great question. Pokemon Go was actually a secret tool created by the government so that ordinary civilians can constantly help us triangulate Air Bud's position. I was the head of the project, and they made me the mascot.

Josh: huh

While Willow bragged about how cool he was and how he made a billion dollars from Pokemon go, Spencer examined the strange portal object thing. Pulling outa knife from his knife collection, he slowly pushed the tip of the knife through the vortex. He then retrieved some throwing knifes and took several skilled tossed into the portal.

Willow: so as I was saying-

Willow: WHAT ARE YOU DOING

Spencer: sall good

Willow: THAT PORTAL COULD LEAD ANYWHERE IN ANY UNIVERSE

Willow: WHO KNOWS WHAT THOSE KNJVES COULD HAVE DONE

Spencer: it's probably not important

Willow groaned and deactivated the portal, going back to his work. Pepper led them away and into a hallway of bedrooms, each with two beds

Pepper: feel free to take which ever room you like and make yourselves at home. It's going to be a busy day tomorrow.

Josh: hey Don you mind if we share a room

Don: oh

Don: yeah that's cool

Dom: I'll be alone

Debra: Hey Abby we could share a room

Abigail: sure

Geoff: but wait that means I have to be with

Spencer: FUCK

Spencer: YOU

Geoff: ballz

Everyone filed into their rooms as Pepper returned to his office. Tomorrow was the big day, the day to decide all days. It would singlehandedly save or destroy the hope of humanity. Phase 3 of operation BUD had begun.


	15. Chapter 15: Charles' Tour of Hell

[initiate telepathical conversation]

Charles: so this is hell?

Wolf: no

Charles: then why did you

Wolf: cuz it's funny

Charles: oh

Charles: I can't argue with that

Charles: but that begs the question

Charles: where am I?

Charles: I remember a lot of blood and a lot of pain and then I just woke up here.

Wolf: I've been here for years and I haven't seen anyone that knows the actual name

Wolf: let's just call it the afterlife, even though it's just a microverse

Charles: what?

Wolf: just don't worry about it

Wolf: wait hold up I'm going to find you in person

Charles squinted his eyes, noticing a slender figure standing atop one of the many green dunes. The entire area was basically a sea of green plains, barren aside from a few towers that were scattered around the area. The figure approached to reveal a short boy with ruffled hair. He reached out and shook

Charles' hand, introducing himself.

Wolf: The name's Wolf

Wolf: I thought I'd come and give you a tour around this place

Wolf: You're part of something much bigger

Charles gazed around him in a confused daze, not knowing how to take it all in.

Charles: I'm just so confused.

Wolf: You got killed by a shit ton of knives

Wolf: now you're in the afterlife and I'm going to give you a tour

Wolf: just don't think too hard about it right now

Wolf grabbed Charles' hand and they suddenly arrived in a crowded party, with millions of people getting down. Upon their arrival everybody abruptly stopped and turned to face Charles. That is, until the DJ acknowledged him.

DJ: LETS GIVE IT UP FOR THE NEW MEMBER CHARLES!

Everybody applauded Charles, and then continued to get jiggy with it. Wolf dragged Charles through the crowd, sitting him at a bar and sitting next to him.

Wolf ordered like 57 cans of gasoline and drank all of them in like two seconds. Meanwhile, Charles was busy having an existential crisis.

Wolf: whoa dude are you ok

Charles: how can I be ok

Charles: I just died!

Charles: I guess I just don't know how to feel about this whole thing.

Wolf paused, looked at Charles, and then gave him a 3 millisecond kiss.

Charles: WHAT THE FUCK

Wolf: calm yourself

Wolf: I need you to relax

Wolf grabbed Charles' hand and they jumped to an open field covered in lime green grass.

Charles: How are you even doing that?

Wolf: how are you telepizing with me right now?

Wolf: in here, your mind shapes reality.

Wolf: why don't you try it?

Wolf: just imagine the most relaxing place you can think of

Charles closed his eyes and focused his mind. When he opened them, he and Wolf were surrounded by flames. Wolf grabbed Chatles' hand and they returned to the green dunes that Charles woke up on.

Wolf: maybe you should keep working on that

Wolf: all I can say is that soon, your friends will be in danger and I need you to help them.

Charles: how will I help?

Charles: what can I do when I'm dead?

Wolf: you can redeem yourself.

Charles looked up and saw one of the scattered towers was in front of him. Not only that, but the tower was engraved with Charles' name. Before Charles could say anything, wolf asked him a question.

Wolf: can I ask, do you remember where you were when you died?

Charles: I was in my house, on the floor...

Charles: Air Bud was there too...

Charles: licking my blood?

Wolf smiled and looked intently at Charles.

Wolf: so air bud is your spiritual object...

Charles: I don't Have any idea what is happening anymore

Wolf: when you die, your soul passes on into something else.

Wolf: it could be anything

Wolf: because Air Bud locked away your blood, your soul passed on into him

Charles: ok... So?

Wolf gestured to the tower.

Wolf: when you die, you are given a chance at redemption

Wolf: your own tower filled with trials that have to do with unfinished business from your previous life.

Wolf: completing these trials grants you control over your spiritual object, an opportunity to influence the physical world

Wolf: if you complete your trials, you could control air bud and assist your friends on their quest.

Charles looked up at the tower, then at Wolf, then back down at the green ground. He stood up and gave wolf one of those cool bro hug things.

Charles: let's fucking do this shit.


	16. Chapter 16: Scheming in the night

Abigail quietly slipped out from under the sheets and rolled out of bed at around 2:30 in the morning. She had to be careful not to wake anybody up this early. She was on her own mission tonight.

Silently turning the door knob, she slipped out of the bedroom, only to see Dominic right in front of the room.

[intiate auditorial conversation]

Dom: sup

Abigail: oh shit

Abigail: sorry you surprised me

Dom: you should know by now that I know when things are about to happen moments before they happen.

Abigail: whatever

Dom: so what are you doing

Abigail: I'm...

Abigail: super sleuthing

Dom: what?

Abigail: there's some weird shit going down around here and I want to get to the bottom of it

Dom: I'm coming with you

Abigail: no thanks

Dom: it wasn't a question

Abigail: fine whatever

The two walked down the hall, approaching an air vent. Abigail pulled a Bobby pin from her hair and picked the screw out from the vent. She gestured for Dom to climb in. With a swoos, Dom parkourdd inside, but not before letting out a quiet shout of pain. The pain caused him to fall back out of the vent.

Abigail: are you ok? What happened?

Dom: it's nothing

Dom tried to get back up, wincing in pain again and falling back down. Abigail examined Dominic's hand

Dom: wait no don't look

Abigail found a collection of cuts and scars on Dom's right hand that spelled out some sort of encrypted code:

POE ZTARVOPAZS UQKO WN E BYANL

Abigail: what the heck is this

Dom: I have no idea

Dom: recently I've just been cutting messages into myself in my sleep

Dom: I assume it's some prediction of the future, but I can't understand how to decrypt it

Abigail: huh

Abigail: well you should probably take these

Abigail retrieved a roll of bandages and gave them to Dom.

Dom: do you just carry these everywhere or what

Abigail: I stole them from the medical department during the tour

Abigail: I always like to be prepared before a mission

After patching up his hand, Dom swoosed right in and Abigail followed. Crawling through the freezing metal vents, sounds echoed around them. They could hear broken up speech every once in a while, coming from miscellaneous conference rooms they passed by.

Dom: what made you so suspicious?

Abigail: blood in the elevator was the first thing

Abigail: but also pepper has been acting strange lately

Abigail: like strangely triumphant

Dom: huh

They continued on, eventually passing by Pepper's office. Peeking through the vent, Dom saw Pepper throwing darts at a picture of Air Bud.

Dom: yeah he's just throwing darts at air bud

Dom: it's kinda disturbing

Abigail: yeah

Dom: I'm don't think he's plotting something though

Dom: I think he's just weird

Abigail: maybe you're right

Dominic and Abigail returned from whence they came and screwed the air vent back on. Silently, they returned to their dormitories and prepared for the tomorrow's big mission.

SECRET HINT: the song name of the last secret is the key


	17. Chapter 17: Tap trial

Charles shot open his eyes and observed his surroundings. He was in a typical Pizza Hut with a can of Pibb Xtra in his left hand. Taking a sip, he noticed something large approaching the Pizza Hut. As Charles squinted to observe it, the Honda Civic crashed through the glass doors of the Pizza Parlor and killed Charles in one hit.

Charles then woke up in the "real" world and shot out of the Tower of Trials. It had been his third attempt to pass by the first gate, and Charles hadn't shown any improvement. Wolf was also there, for emotional "support"

[initiate telepathical conversation]

Wolf: wow you really suck at this don't you

Charles: yeah thanks for the help

Charles: also what the heck even was that trial?

Charles: what does almost being killed in a Pizza Hut have to do with something I did in the real world?

Wolf: don't ask me man it's your life

Charles stumbled to his feet and sighed, falling back down flat on his back.

Charles: man, being dead sucks

Wolf shrugged.

Wolf: you say that now, but trust me, once you make progress on your trials, the afterlife becomes amazing

Wolf: im talking like free breadsticks at Pizza Hut amazing

Charles: don't talk about Pizza Hut

Charles: it's starting to haunt me now

Charles got up again, facing Wolf to ask him a question.

Charles: hey, if you don't mind me asking…

Charles: how did you die?

Wolf: Air Bud killed me

Charles spit out the sip of Pibb he was still drinking somehow.

Charles: Air Bud!?

Wolf: Yep. He just whapped me in the back of the head with a baseball bat and my head crashed into a television screen.

Charles: Wait, does that mean that your spiritual object is a tv?

Wolf: indeed. Here, let me show you.

Wolf grabbed Charles's hand and they jumped in front of another tower, this time labeled Micheal.

Wolf: that's my "real" name I guess

Wolf: i prefer wolf because it sounds cool

Wolf: also it's my operation BUD codename so

Charles: you know you keep talking about this operation BUD but you never really explained it to me

Wolf: basically the government cloned a bunch of animals to make you, me, and your friends, and then raised us alone in different areas so we could hone our particular skills and talents until they gathered us together to kill Air Bud

Charles: I don't mind being a part of a government operation if it means killing air bud

Charles: I need that popcorn chicken

Charles:but wait, if I died before they gathered us to kill air bud, and you died before me, how do you know about operation BUD?

Wolf: aside from Abigail, the designated leader, I was the only one to find out that I was in an operation before they sent us to live alone. This complicated their whole plan, since we weren't supposed to know. I agreed to live much farther away from the rest of the agents and not communicate with you guys until the gathering. It didn't matter that much in the end, since air bud killed me.

Wolf: but that's aside the point. Let's check out this tower!

Wolf welcomed Charles inside his humble abode. While Charles hadn't even completed enough trials to enter his tower, wolf had clearly made mounds of progress. The interior of the tower was regal and Victorian, like a mansion where someone may or may not want to swing on a chandelier. There were doors everywhere, presumably leading to other trials, as well as a massive spiral staircase that led up to the many floors above.

Charles gazed in awe of this magnificent sight. He unglued his eyes from the beautiful tapestries on the wall and stared into a large pair of oak doors. Wolf used all his willpower to force the massive doors open, holding them ajar for Charles to slip inside.

Letting the doors slam behind him, Wolf led Charles to the massive screen on the opposite wall, where a huge setup of devices were strewn about a large control panel. The screen itself displayed nothing but static, white noise emitting across the room.

Wolf: this is my control panel

Wolf: basically I received a new device after every rigorous trial, and I decide to install them all into one center

Wolf: the screen shows what my spiritual television displays

With the flip of a few switches, wolf changed the set to display a brand new episode of Bill Nye the scientific person.

Charles: So you have full control over the tv?

Wolf: yep. I've completed all my trials, kid. All my unfinished business has been checked off.

Charles: so what do you do with this?

Wolf: well you know that guy Dom

Charles: oh no

Charles: not that guy

Charles: he's creepy

Wolf: tell me about it dude

Wolf: anyways, some douchbags raided my house after I died and some old dude sold the tv at a garage sale. Dom happened to be the one to buy it, and using my spiritual powers, I helped him with his fortune telling omniscience shit

Wolf: completing your trials doesn't just improve your physical control, but also your spiritual knowledge.

Wolf: basically since I've completed all my trials, I know what is currently happening in the physical world

Wolf: you'll get better at it

Wolf: just visualize the world from Air Bud's perspective

Charles: well, we didn't exactly see eye to eye, but I'll try

Charles: he's... Sleeping?

Charles: ... In my room.

Wolf: now that's what I'm talking about

Wolf that'll definitely help you as you gain control over air bud.

Wolf: now how's about we start doing some trials?

With a groan, Charles and Wolf jumped back in front of Charles' tower. Charles hesitated before swinging the door ajar and being enveloped by a bright light.

Charles awoke to find himself in his house. Everything seemed to be in order, until a loud bark alerted Charles. Loud growling began, building louder and louder, as Charles came face to face with his worst enemy. Air bud slowly approached Charles, growling as his agitation increased. Charles was cornered, his Hope diminished, until an opportunity arose. His car keys! Charles jingled his keys in front of Air Bud, who became distracted by the clanking sounds. Charles took his opportunity to look for any solution, his eyes coming upon a lime green tennis ball. Charles hurled the ball and air bud followed in pursuit. Am I supposed to be nice to air bud? Is that my challenge? Charles scavenged his pantry, retrieving a dog treat. He playfully tossed the treat to air bud, who ecstatically ate it. Charles began to pet air bud, and he was once again consumed by bright light.

Charles stumbled onto hard, cold wooden floor. Standing up, he found himself in an abstract art gallery of sorts, elegant murals showering the walls. Doors to other trials surrounded a small table lying in the center of the room. Charles approached the table, picking up the device sitting atop it. It seemed to just be a metal box with a bright red button attached. Charles carefully tapped the button, causing his body to uncomfortably twitch. Wolf entered the room, leaning against one of the many murals.

Charles: what the heck is this

Charles: I mean the room is cool and all but what is the point of this button

Wolf: maybe its controlling Air Bus

Wolf: check with your minds eye

Charles: it's .. Making him twitch too

Charles: so I have a button that makeS him twitch

Wolf: hey it's something

Wolf: your spiritual object is a living thing, so you're trials are probably going to be more complicated than mine

Wolf: it may take longer, but I'm sure it'll be worth it

Charles sighed

Charles: i need a vodka

So they jumped to the bar party place to get some blazin drinks yo

Popping bottles

To be continueietued


	18. Chapter 18: Theivin Away

[initiate auditorial conversation]

Don: so this is the place?

Abigail; yep

The phase 3 operation bud agents stood outside the abode of the now deceased Charles. They were given the kind of breakfast you would expect from a military base and sent out to confront Air Bud and retrieve the stone sphere thing. Without actually getting proper weapons, which was pretty stupid. Abigail carried an array of weapons in her compactable back pack, Spencer had his knives and Debra had her eagle, but other than that, they were probably fucked.

Slowly and cautiously, Abigail cracked open the front door. Seeing that the coast was clear, the crew filed inside, finding a run down house with bloodstains everywhere. Spencer, of course, was already stooping down to snatch up the various knives on the ground as well.

Spencer: hey, these feel just like mine

Spencer spun the knives around and holstered them like they were an old friend. Speaking of old friends, Charles's lifeless corpse was lying there as well, the green tint in his eyes lacking in energy and emotion. The group silently moved past his body respectfully, with the exception of Spencer, who reacted in a way similar to realizing that you left a stash of 50 hot pockets in your pocket.

As they moved past, they started to hear a slow growl, a snore of sorts. Air bud must be nearby. Abigail creaked open the door to revealing air bud snooZing peacefully.

Abigail: ok here's the plan

Abigail: Josh you're going to grab the stone

Abigail: and then were gonna run away

Abigail: that's pretty much it

Josh : why do I have to grab it?

Abigail: I thought you loved air bud

Josh: yeah but I'd hate to disturb his sleep

Abigail: shut up and just do it

Josh: fine

Josh slowly approached the sleeping dog and reached into his fluffy golden fur, as pure as the pickle on a turkey bacon club. His hand hit something cold and hard (don't laugh) and he retrieved a neon yellow spherical stone.

Josh: aight I got it

Abigail: k let's bounce

So they were stealthing away and the mission would've been a success if it weren't for that DINGUS Spencer who tripped on a salad and screamed SHIT on the way out. The loud exclamation awoke the golden retriever, who realized that his stone was gone, and in a blast of rage exploded the door and faced to see the group of teenagers that theived off with his property.

It was time to play some rummikub. Rummikub was what the cool kids called a turn based fight with more than two players, unlike Scrabble. Anywho, the battle Bagan. Air Bud got a speed bonus so he attacked first he used his madden middle and KO'd Josh in one hit.

Don: Josh!

Abigail: stand back, I got this.

Abigail used her summon and summoned Jeff Goldblum, who came in a spaceship and shot Air Bus like 50 times. Air Bud took 5 damage out of his like 10000 health, so basically they were all fucked.

Air Bud charged up again, and KO'd Spencer with a loud FUCK

Debra: leave it to me!

Debra used her special move; AVIAN AIRSTRIKE. Reosir, her eagle, created a whirlwind of wind and jabbed at Air Bud with her razor sharp beak! Air Bus took 79 damage.

Air Bud charged up thrice as much, and KO'd Abigail, Debra, and Don! Now they didn't have any weapon users anymore! Ballz!

Geoff: welp

Geoff: nows a good a time as any to test these out.

Geoff: Dom! Take my hand

Dom grapes on to Geoffs hand and Geoff grapped everybody else too. Geoff then leaped into the air, activating his gun soaps using the buttons under the toes. The metal sheet slid out from under the heel and a gun barrel was revealed. Geoff shot like a million bullets out of his soaps, hitting Air Bud for 40 damage! Before Air Bud could attack again, the crew fled using the rocket component on Geoff's soaps. Geoof carried everybody out of there, the stone in tow, and rocketed away back to the base.

Geoff: hey Dom

Dom: yeah

Geoff: you didn't really do anything this chapter

Dom: yeah I guess not

Dom: welp

Dom: I don't even care

Geoff: sick dude

Then Dom gave Geoff a three millisecond kiss on the cheek just kidding I just wanted to put that in to make Kenny mad

To be continued


	19. Chapter 19: Pepper's dark secret past

Abigail arrived at a large gate atop the clouds, emitting a heavenly light unlike any she had seen before. A figure descended gracefully, landing on the condensation. Abigail gazed in awe at the figure.

[initiate blessed conversation]

Abigail: God?

Abigail: is that you?

The figure stepped out from the shadows and revealed himself.

Black Snata: Nope it's just me black Santa

Abigail: oh

Abigail: still pretty cool though

A burst of white light blinded Abigail, and she suddenly shot open her eyes to see an operating room. All of her friends were standing around her as well.

Dom: oh hey you're awake

Abigail: what happened?

Geoff: we got the stone and stuff and then Air Bud like knocked all you guys out except me and Dom and then we flew off into the sunset

Geoff: and then you healed up and what ever

Abigail: how long was I out?

Geoff: couple hours

Abigail: ok

Dom: yeah we should probably report to Pepper about our mission and all that jazz

So the DK crew wandered out of the infirmary and went up the elevator to Pepper's office. Once they arrived, pepper swiveled around to face the team, grinning both pridefully and creepily.

Geoff: so yeah we got the stone or whatever

Spencer: no thanks to YOU, PEPPER!

Pepper: spectacular work, agents. This stone is vital to our plan. Please, give it to me.

Geoff handed the stone to Pepper and he held it as if it would solve all his problems. Standing up, he began to make a speech to the crew.

Pepper: you're probably all thinking, "what do we do now?" Well originally, we were going to send you on a huge multidimensional quest to find more stones and then complete the sacred rainbow and take Air Bud out using the power of love, but there's been a change of plans. As you have most likely already seen, this stone contains unbelievable amounts of energy. Consider what would happen if it were to break.

Debra: the entire earth would explode?

Pepper: perhaps, but that's not important. We must get rid of air bud by fighting fire with fire. That's why I developed the KILLAIRBUDINATOR!

Pepper pulled down an over head thingy that displayed a diagram of some sort of crazy mechanical conundrum. Everybody was perplexed by it except Geoff who stared at it in awe.

Pepper: basically I made a weapon that will create a huge burst of energy that will destroy the stone which will create a greater burst of energy that will probably kill Air Bud.

Pepper: it also doubles as a moon base which is my dream so yeah

Abigail: but wait what about all my training?

Josh; plus the fact that you're probably going to kill everbody on earth

Pepper: that doesn't matter anymore. I must kill air bud to AVENGE MY SECOND COUSIN WHO WAS ACTUALLY NEIL ARMSTrong!

What a twist. His cousin was actually buzz aldrin and also that explains why he always wanted to work in a moon base

Pepper suddenly pressed a button on his desk and a secret door opened to reveal an escape pod. Before any of them could protest, Pepper slid into the room and lifted off into the earths orbit

Spencer: WELL FUCK

Spencer: WERE ALL GOING TO DIE

Don was panicking in the corner while Josh tried to comfort him with a sympathy rub. Debra looked mildly disappointed, while Geoff continued to adore the intricate mechanics of the KILLAIRBUDINATOR. Dom didn't looked surprised by any of this, as expected, and Abigail quickly tried to form a plan.

Abigail: well, maybe we can-

Spencer: WHAT? WE CAN WHAT? IVE HAD IT UP TO HERE WITH THIS FUCKING AIR BUD BULLSHIT. I ACTUALLY KIND OF ENJOYED BEING ALIVE BUT THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN WE HAVE TO SAVE THE WORLD FROM AN ARMY OF FUCKING CANINES! THIS IS ALL YOUR FUCKING FAULT, ABIGAIL. FUCK YOU, DIE, KILL YOURSELF, NO ONE LIKES YOU, FUCK!

The room went suddenly quiet from Spencer's unexpected outburst. He took a deep breath, followed by a deep exhale.

Spencer: ok, im good now

Abigail: ok... Well...

Abigail: I'm super experienced in stealth sniping and rifles and stuff

Abigail: I bet I could shoot Pepper before he kills us all.

Dom: you're going to shoot him from the ground.

Abigail: yep

Dom: while he's in space

Abigail: yep

Dom: alrighty then

Abigail unpacked a crazy looking sniper rifle from her compactable backpack.

Abigail: don't worry, this gun has like an 6.02 x 10^23 magnification. I bet I can get him. While I'm gone, we need to think of an escape plan.

Josh: escape plan from what?

Abigail: trust me, I know air bud enough to know he doesn't give up. He's going to track us down and we need somewhere to go.

Josh: what about the portal Willow was working on?

Abigail: alright, worst case scenario, use the portal.

Dom: good luck on shooting pepper

Abigail gripped her rifle and walked towards the door.

Abigail: I don't need luck, kid.

To be concluded


	20. Chapter 20: A Day in the Life

Abigail stepped out into the cold night-time rain, holding her trusty model 420 2K16 Sniper Rifle tight against her heart. It was representative of an Average American practicing their right to arm bears, the most important amendment. Lightning struck all around her, and she prepared herself before she set off to kill her former mentor.

[jnitiate auditorial conversation]

Abigail: let's do this shit

Charles gulped down his third bottle of vodka, slamming it down on the bar.

Wolf: whoa jeez calm down

Wolf: are you okay?

Charles: yeah I'm good

Charles wasn't intoxicated because he's dead by the way everbody knows that dude.

Wolf: we should probably head back to your tower and do some trials

Charles: why do you want to do so many trials?

Charles: I mean we're not in a huge hurry, right?

Wolf: uh, yeah we actually kind of are

Charles: fuck that noise

Suddenly Charles yelled out in pain as his hands shot to his forehead, causing his 4th bottle to plummet onto the floor.

Wolf: whoa geez are you alright?

Charles: AGH

Wolf: do you need medical attention?

Charles: ow

Charles: nah I'm good it's just it felt like someone was talking to me from inside my brain and I kinda freaked out

Wolf gazed at Charles with a cold, serious glare.

Wolf: so it's finally happening.

If there was one thing the operation bud team was awful at, it was stealth. So it may not have been that great of an idea for rosebud to leave the rest of them alone to find an escape route. Luckily, Dom remembered the network of air vents from Chapter 16, and they started to sleuth their way to the laboratory on the 3rd floor.

Spencer: THIS SUCKS

Dom: yeah I think you've been saying that for the last 30 minutes

Spencer: it's true though

Debra's breathing got a bit spastic. She focused all her energy on her slow inhale and the equally slow exhale, but somehow this exercise only made her panic more.

Debra: Dom?

Debra: when are we going to get there?

Dom: not in another 15 minutes or so

Debra sighed with concern and breathed in through the nose, and out through the mouth OH SHIT SHE COULDNT BREATHE

Debra started to hyperVENTilate (get it?) due to her massive claustrophobia that haunted her. She wanted nothing more than to return to the free fields and the fresh air of her home. Oh, home. Such a comforting image. Debra could only imagine her life back home, simpler and less sucky than when air bud was involved. Debra expressed all of her deep emotional conflicts and longing in one sentence.

Debra: THIS SUCKS

[initiate radio conversation]

Pepper: Abigail? Are you there?

Abigail stopped dead in her tracks as her portable radio codec thingy started emitting the voice of her former mentor.

Pepper: what are trying to do Abigail? Kill me? After all we've been through?

Abigail brushed off this annoying guys voice and looked down the scope of her rifle.

Pepper: ever since your were born, I've been teaching you everything I know about being a hero. And now, when we can save the world, you just want to throw it all away?

The rain clouds blocked her vision, preventing her from making an accurate shot.

Pepper: you were like a daughter to me. I provided you with so much and this is how you repay me? Without me, you would be nothing!

Agent Rosebud suddenly saw a golden opportunity. Peering down the long scope, she leaned closer into the radio.

Abigail: pepper?

Pepper: yes, agent rosebud?

Abigail: fuck you.

Charles: so let me get this straight

Charles: I can communicate with the animal I am a clone of?

Charles: and that's what that voice was? The voice of Billy?

Wolf: yep that's the gist

Charles: now that's what I'm talking about

Charles: let's head back to my place and do some motherfuckin trials!

Wolf: ok...?

Climbing out of the vents after what felt like an eternity, Debra gasped for fresh air. What she got instead was cold, artificial air, but hey, at least it was better than the vents. The group activated sneak mode and stealthed their way through the facility. Once they got to the hallway where the portal lied, Dom huddled up the crew and start some stratego.

Dom: ok

Dom: so we're gonna kill Professor Willow

Josh: WHAT?

Debra: yeah, seems reasonable.

Josh: HOW?

Dom: we need to get to that portal without resistance

Dom: we must kill Willow.

Dom slowly pulled out a small dirking device out from his back pocket. Panicking, Josh ended his dilemma by walking right into the open where Willow could clearly see him.

Spencer: *whisper* WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?

Willow heard the voice and turned to see Josh, standing proudly with a wide smile.

Willow: oh, hello agent Budderball. Shouldn't you be in Pepper's office?

Apparently they don't know about the whole pepper thing he thought. Alright time to get rid of this guy

Josh: Pepper told me to tell you that there's been a leak of Dihydrogen Oxide on Floor 28.

Willow: ugh, not again!

With a groan, Willow grabbed his tools and made his way up to floor 28, leaving the portal open for them to mess with. The crew stepped out from the shadows and looked at Josh, stunned.

Dom: how did you do that?

Dom: you like just talked to him instead of killing him!

Dom: that's genius!

The crew investigated the panel of controls by the portal.

Dom: alright Geoff, I need you to figure out how to activate a portal system using secret technology all by yourself.

Geoff: aight

Pepper: excuse me!?

Abigail: you heard me. I fucking hate you. You raised me without a speck of a chance of living a normal life, alone in a cold government facility, Separated from my friends unless I had a mission to do, and forced me to risk my life against something that is seemingly invincible. I despise every moment I see your stupid face, you disgusting piece of garbage. Fuck you, fuck you, no one likes you, see ya later, you're dead.

Abigail pulled the trigger with her scope focused on the moon. Obviously, if pepper could radio communicate with her, it meant that he was exactly 55 degrees from where she was standing. By trajectoring the shot compared to the trajectory of the moon, the bullet reflected off of the surface of the space rock and hit pepper directly in the eyeball. Pepper screamed in pain, slamming down on the fire button as life escaped his body. A matrix of yellow beams surrounded the spherical stone, charging up the weapon and launching a massive beam of energy that crushed 1/3 of the entire planet, destroying the stone in the process. Abigail stood on the new edge of the planet and looked down into the core of the earth and the now exposed government base.

Abigail: ballz

The crew turned around to see a massive hole in the wall of the base, exposing the night sky. Also there was a loud noise.

Spencer: what the FUCK was THAT?

Suddenly, Abigail jumped down from the edge and through the hole, regrouping with the crew.

Abigail: portal, now!

Geoff: i can't get it to work until the battery is of sufficient charge!

Abigail: then do something!

Geoff: we just need a few more seconds...

Suddenly again, Air Bud smashed through the unsmashed part of the wall, his yellow eyes flaring with anger and charging up a similar attack to when they were in Charles house.

Spencer: FUCK

Abigail: Geoff, we need that portal!

Geoff: just...a few more seconds...

Air Buds attack was almost at full charge. Abigail closed her eyes and prepared for the embrace of death.

Charles and wolf stood in Charles's crazy tower place. Charles's hand hovered over the door knob to the next trial, when suddenly, he gasped.

Wolf: what?

Charles: they're in trouble!

Wolf: what?

Charles: I can see it... My friends are about to die!

Charles paced around the room, panicking.

Charles: I need to do something! What can I do?

He could sense his friends on the brink of death when he quickly noticed the button in the table. I'm not sure what he was thinking, but Charles suddenly slammed his palm on the button in order to save his friends. Pretty dumb if you ask me. Anyway, he felt a strange twitch and collapsed on the ground.

Air buds death laser fired, and narrowly missed the crew! Abigail shut open her eyes to see the canines head twitch at the precise moment, causing him to miss.

Geoff: got it!

The portal suddenly activated, a vortex of lime green energy appearing. The group rushed in before the portal ran out of battery, closing the portal behind them.

Abigail couldn't remember seeing much. A sea of orange with white clouds, the cool air, the screams of Spencer as the group plummeted, probably to their deaths. She felt the impact of her body hitting the ground, and the world went black.

END OF PROLOUGE


	21. PART 1: MEGADRIVE

"To understand the future, we must first understand the past." -Will Smith


	22. Chapter 21: Rise of the Air Buds

With a splash of lime static electricity, an alligator appeard above a seemingly calm planet, dry and seeping with sand. The alligator reached in her back pocket and produced a small walkie talkie. She clicked the button with a beep, and spoke to her accomplice.

"This is Glucose Bud. Awaiting directions, over."

"You do realize that there's only two of us, right? No need to be all formal"

"Punctuate your sentences and close all communication with over, over."

"Whatever, dude. Head to the sandy planet and find the Crimson pyramid, it should be hard to miss"

"Affirmative, over."

"Uggh, over."

"See, now you get it, over!"

Whoa whoa wait I hear you all say. That was an auditorial conversation, right? You should have bracketed the section to initiate and deinitiate the conversation! Well first of all, I'll do whatever the frick I want, because you frickin fricks ruined Air Bud for all of us! Also, 4th dimensional beings like Glucose Bud and whoever the heck this other person is have transcended beyond the realm of conversation as we know it. They just talk, without announcing how they're talking! It's beyond me!

Glucose Bud used her jet propulsion device and started plummeting through the atmosphere of the sandy planet with no name. Dust was swept by the wind as the alligator hit the sedimentary ground. This planet was much more windy than Glucose Bud had expected, but never mind that. She was here on a mission.

The alligator slowly approached the crimson pyramid, placing her claw or foot or whatever you want to call it on the door. Reaching into her pocket, Glucose Bud retrieved a light silver key and carefully inserted it into the lock. The door slid ajar to reveal a large chamber. Glucose bud scuttled up the staircase and searched for signs of life.

The wind swept into the chamber and Glucose Bud could hear a loud thud. Turning around, she saw a small golden retriever with yellow eyes and a mischievous grin. The alligator picked up the young canine, its fur waving in the air.

"I found the bud, over."

"What bud type is it?"

"It seems to be a Paroxysm bud, judging by the yellow eyes."

"Paroxysm is pretty cool. What element?"

"I didn't see what reacted with it, but judging by the windiness of the planet, I would assume it's Air."

"Huh. Well, you should probably head back to the teleporter"

"Affirmative, over."

Glucose Bud turned to leave with the golden retriever, when another loud thud was heard. She turned back around, only to find another golden retriever with lime green eyes and a somber, melancholy look.

Scooping him up, Glucose Bud wore a shocked look on her face, and reached for her walkie talkie. Before she could contact that other bud though, CYBERNETIC ARACHNIDS burst into the chamber!

Glucose Bud used her scouter tool, to find that their gigawatts were over 200000000000! Glucose Bud charged her Paroxysm energy to unleash a powerful attack on the arachnids, but unfortunately, Glucose is a horrible element and she didn't give them a scratch.

So then she swiftly evaded them as she fled the pyramid, taking flight with her propulsion mechanism. She could see the portal in front of her, growing closer, but she turned to see the arachnids following her! In an act of desperation, she flung the terrified canines into the portal, seconds before being ripped apart by arachnids.

"Glucose? Hello?"

Graphite Bud spoke into her walkie talkie, receiving only blank silence.

"Dude? Cmon man! Answer me!"

Suddenly, two golden retriever's rolled out of the portal to Graphite Bud's left. The walkie talkie also started to make noise, and Glucose Bud was responding!

"AAAGHJHHJHAJFKFNHRHCKSHHDHJ"

*and more screaming ensued*

The connection went blank, as the walkie talkie on the other end was destroyed by arachnids. Glucose Bud was dead.

"Dang it." said Graphite Bud at the death of her best friend. She shrugged it off and stooped down to retrieve the buds. She suddenly hesitated, seeing that there were two buds instead of the usual two.

"What the hell?" Graphite Bud observed the two buds playing with each other, twins of different bud types.

She lifted them up, and the two dogs faced each other. One with a dark, sinister grin, another with a somber, tired smile. It was the birth of two buds of the same bud, and while it seemed like an average day in the BUd polyverse, the Air Buds were going to change everything.


	23. Chapter 22: The tyranny begins

Lying in the center of a grass field, a humble abode snoozed as a stir began in its innards. The sharp ringing of crashing steel awoke the home, alerting the passing buds.

"Cmon Bro, hurry up with those knives!"

"Coming!"

A verdant eyed quadruped hurried up the steps, placing a tray of dirking devices on a nearby table. He examined the room, inspecting the strange targets that faced the wall to his side. A golden retriever with snake-like laser lemon retinas approached slowly behind him.

"Boo."

"OH SHIT" exclaimed the bud with green ojos as the other bud erupted with laughter. The surprised bud laughed along, jokingly punching the bud in the leg.

"I hate you." He said to the still laughing bud. "What did you want to show me?"

The yellow eyed bud sprung up and excitingly grabbed several dirking devices.

"Alright check this" he explained. "I call this technique the qwirkle technique"

The golden retriever breathed deeply, pulling back his front leg, launching a bunch of dirking devices charged with Paroxysm gigawatts at the targets. Each knife was a direct bullseye, puncturing the targets with a satisfying slice.

"Whoa!" The green bud examined the knives. "Where'd you learn to do that?"

"I learned it myself." The paroxysm bud bragged. "I used the air to control the blades. You should try!"

The green bud shrugged. "I'm not sure, I don't have your yellow electricity powers."

The yellow eyed canine handed the other a handful of knives anyways, and with a sigh, he pulled back his leg and tossed the knives with a small spark of green energy. The knives flopped onto the floor pathetically, and the green bud frowned

"I'm sure you'll get better!" The yellow bud encouraged. The green bud shrugged and headed into his room to do some homework, with the yellow bud in close pursuit.

"Did you finish the essay for class yet?" The green bud inquired.

The yellow bud gave an annoyed sigh. "The one about the almighty Licorice Bud? No." He got out his homework, wearing a frustrated look. "Doesn't it get on your nerves that he's praised as a hero for basically doing nothing? Like, he committed mass genocide, got rid of sexual reproduction, and treats all of us like viruses, made only to reproduce. That sounds like a villain to me."

The green bud shrugged. "I guess."

The yellow bud sighed once again, looking over the report prompt.

[initiate prompt]

Write about a time when Licorice Bud inspired you to do good.

[deinitiate prompt]

The canine crumpled up the prompt and tossed it onto the floor. Getting out a piece of paper, he wrote something at the top.

The green bud peeked over his shoulder to see. "The Tyranny of Lord Air BUd?"

The yellow bud turned, surprised, and covered his paper. "It's nothing!"

The green bud gave a soft grin. "Cmon bro, I want to see it."

The yellow bud sighed, passing over the paper. "It's just a kind of imagination thing I do sometimes. I imagine what I would do if I was the Bud President, how I would benefit the world."

The green bud looked over the paper, intrigued. "Dude, this is actually really cool. You could go to law school or something. Why Lord Air Bud though? Wouldn't King Air Bud be cooler?"

The yellow bud smiled. "Keep reading."

"Lord Air Bud will also be guided by his brother, King Air Bud." The green bud looked up. "Me?"

"Yep." The yellow bud looked longingly out the window.

"What's wrong?"

"It's just sometimes, I wish I could actually do it. Start my rebellion against the system, save the world..." The bud sighed. "But I'm just a kid."

The green bud left the room, then came back with a stack of flyers promoting Lord Air Bud's Tyranny.

"What is this?"

The green bud smiled. "Lord Air Bud, I'm gonna help you save the world."


	24. Chapter 23: The Buds go to the teach

Curled up in the student desks that have that annoying bar that connects the desk with the chair why did they have to design it that way I mean it's so inconvenient you can only sit through one side unless you want to look like a cool kid and like jump over the bar, but that also makes you look like a jerk wow I'm completely off topic now, the air bud brothers sat right next to each other in the classroom. The desks were organized in alphabetical order by element, but since they were brothers (which is really rare btw) they had the same element and thus sat next to each other. It was cool though cause they were friends and stuff.

It was mandatory for them to attend a breeding school so that they could become breeders themselves. It's not like they had much of a choice though, they were organized into a career when they were born.

The pigeon that also happened to be their teacher flapped himself into the class, silencing the students that were messing around in the back. Mercury Bud always messed around with his gang selling morphine. They called them the Mighty Morphine Morphine Rangers, named after some ancient folk tale about some guys who fought monsters or something. The professor whipped out a baton and pointed to the word ENMITY scrabbled on the blackboard.

"So." The professor began his lecture. "Can anyone tell me the seven bud types?"

Sand bud raised his hand. He was the nerd that no one liked in the class.

The professor gestured at him with a wing. "Yes, Sand Bud?"

Sand Bud cleared his throat. "Guilelessness, Autarchy, Paroxysm, Enmity, Hindrance, Dubiousness, and Neurosis."

The professor shot a star sticker out of his baton that hit Sand Bud directly in the forehead. "Precisely! Last week we learned about Guilelessness, Autarchy, and Paroxysm, and today we will be discussing Enmity."

The professor pointed to a color spectrum on the board. "The Enmity Bud Type is represented by the color green on the spectrum. As we discussed last week, a bud with the eye color of a specific bud type is that bud type. That being said, can I have all the Enmity buds stand up?"

The green-eyed King Air Bud along with a few other students stood up. "Excellent!" The professor exclaimed, gesturing them to sit back down. "You'll also notice that the farther we go down the spectrum, the rarer each bud type becomes. I believe we don't even have any Neurosis bud in this class."

The professor pulled up an overhead and displayed a transparent sheet that displayed different characteristics of the Enmity bud type. "The dictionary definition of enmity is the feeling of opposition one feels towards another. A fair warning to all you Enmity buds out there: except perhaps Neurosis, the Enmity bud type is the hardest to grow up with. It will be hard to control the roller coaster of emotions that will flow through you, but with careful nurturing, the Enmity bud type can also be the most rewarding."

All the Enmity buds gave a sympathetic sigh, including King Air Bud. "A fully grown enmity bud has the ability to channel their hatred for good. Like we discussed last week, most buds experience an outburst, where they are thrown over the edge and allowed access to their full potential. An enmity outburst can be one of the most dangerous catastrophes. If you see an outburst of enmity, call the emergency hotline right away." The professor then slipped on some goggles and gestured toward the door. "Now, let us head to the Megadrive Lab and do some breeding!"

The students excitingly rushed to the lab. This was the first time they got to breed a bud, and everybody eagerly sat in front of one of the many megadrives in the room.

The professor cleared his throat. "Open up the BudChem application on your Megadrive. You've already been taught some basic chemical combinations when making buds, so I'll let you experiment and try to make a stable bud. Go!"

The buds swiftly opened up the BudChem application and started mixing chemicals. Mercury Bud mixed an insufferable amount of morphine in his bud, Sand Bud was actually mathmatically calculating stuff (nobody likes you sand bud you nerd) and Lord Air Bud started a simple arsenic-bromine mixture.

The yellow eyed bud leaned over to peek at his brother's screen. "WhT are you putting in your bud?" He inquired.

The green bud turned to face his brother. "I don't know, I'm just messing around." The bud clicked a few buttons, adding a bit of lithium and magnesium. Using a calculation they learned in class, King Air Bud added a pinch of sulfur to stabilize the lithium magneside.

Suddenly, a loud noise popped, an unstable bud dropping out of the Bud Printer chute. The professor quickly disposed of the bud with Bud Extinguisher. "Incorrect, Silk Bud! You put way too much Iodine in your bud."

One by one, the buds submitted their mixture only to print out unstable buds. Even Lord Air Bud's creation wasn't stable enough to produce a healthy bud. "Wrong, wrong, wrong!" Hollered the professor, who's extinguisher was almost out of gigawatts. "Have I taught you nothing?!"

With a soft, shy click, King Air Bud submitted his mixture. The professor groaned, preparing his extinguisher, but to the bewildered surprise of everyone, a small, yellow sphere popped out of the chute. The professor leaned over to retrieve the stable bud, examining it. "Well done, Air Bud! You have made a stable, generic paroxysm bud!"

The pigeon tossed it to King, who stumbled to catch it. "Keep it safe, it will be a very important memory to reflect on. Class is dismissed!"

The class filed out of the room, King Air Bud embarrassingly clutching the yellow sphere. With a smile, he prepared to leave when he was suddenly stopped by Mercury Bud and his group of goons!

"So..." The intimidating walrus snapped the toothpick in his mouth, because everbody knows that cool guys have toothpicks. "You think you can embarrass me in front of my family and friends and get away with it?" King recoiled as his goons sneered. "I don't think so, bud."

The walrus snatched the bud from King's legs, swifting off. King tried to chase, but couldn't keep up and was forced to watch the goons dash off. Suddenly, a flurry of knives launched towards the goons, KO'ing all of them in one hit. King turned around to see his brother, with the newly rescued bud. "Qwirkle technique, bitch." He uttered. He reached out to give King his bud.

"Here, take it." King Air Bud stared blankly at the yellow sphere, and then pushed it towards Lord air bud. "Take it. If it weren't for you, I would have been killed."

Lord Air Bud opened his snout to protest, but King Air Bud interrupted. "You deserve it, bro."

Lord smiled, and the brothers walked home. "Alright, I'll keep it safe. Now let's go, we have a rebellion to plan!"


	25. Chapter 24: A Short-Lived protest

With paws digging into the hard concrete, the air bud brothers stood on the side of the street. King Air Bud was holding a stack of flyers spreading the word of Lord Air Bud's great tyranny, and Lord Air Bud was protesting while waving a sign that read:

[initiate sign]

Licorice Bud? More like Licorice DUD!

got em

[deinitiate sign]

Despite the endless protesting struggles of the buds, everybudy (get it?) just walked by the brothers, shrugging their revolution off as a silly demonstration.

Lord Air Bud slammed his sign on the ground. "What the FUCK, dude? No one is listening! Wake up, sheeple!" He yelled out in the street. The only response he received was Komodo Dragon who gave him the middle claw. Frustrated, Lord Air Bud collected his things and walked off, King hurriedly following him.

"Where are we going?" King asked. "Back home?"

"No." Lord responded. "We're going deeper."

The brothers walked down a long path, through a lengthy forest, and into a foggy area.

"Where are we?" King worriedly inquired. As the group approached their destination, his eyes widened in shock. "Wait, this is-"

"Bud Tower" said Lord Air Bud as he gazed at the monument before him. It was ya jmagnificent mansion tower thing that was the headquarters for the Bud government and the home of Licorice Bud.

Lord Air Bud led a hesitant King Air Bud up to the massive front doors of the tower. Lord held up his sign and screamed protests at the tower, but was only greeted by silence. With a angry, frustrated face, Lord Air Bud turned to his brother. "Hey, Licorice Bud probably lives on the top floor, right?"

"Uh, yeah?" King said hesitantly. Lord nodded, slowly retrieving five knives from his pocket. With a lightning quick flick of his wrist, the knives soared up to the top floor of the tower.

"Bro, no!" Yelled King as Lord exclaimed "Qwirkle technique!" The buds heard a loud crash as the knives smashed the window of the tower. The buds looked at each other, terrified, as suddenly, two bulls charged out of the front door! The Air Bud brothers raced away, but the Bulls shot them with blue Hindrance gigawatts. The buds collapsed, losing consciousness as the bulls dragged them away to the darkest prison in the BUd polyverse.


	26. Chapter 25: Brombo Vacation

Waking up with a start, Lord Air Bud breathes heavily as he hung suspended by 4 wires, one on each paw, above a large room. A sharp tool on a metal arm also hung from the ceiling, along with King Air Bud in the same 4 wire contraption.

"King!" Lord Aid Nud yelled out to his brother, but he got no response. The golden retriever seemed content to just kinda crying and wallowing in what seemed to be their inevitable death. The yellow-eyed bud gazed into the death-defying drop below.

Suddenly, a huge screen in front of them flashed awake, making their pupils dilate quickly as they adjusted to the bright light. On the screen sat a silhouette of a bud, presumably the infamous Licorice Bud.

"So," the silhouette spoke. "These are the two revolutionists who are starting some sort of rebellion?" Lord Air Bud struggled in anger.

"Fuck you." Lord air bud obviously put up quite an argument. Nevertheless, Licorice Bud laughed and the two buds screamed in pain as the sharp tool seemed to inject them with some sort of substance.

"I don't think you understand, Air Bud. You will not get away with this churlish behavior." The sharp tool switched to some sort of saw thing. "Tell me, Air Bud, have you ever heard of embryonic revival? It's quite an interesting procedure."

The saw thing suddenly jabbed out and sliced Lord Air Bud's leg clean off. The severed limb hung by the wire, as the tool switched to a sort of claw that collected the leg. Lord Air Bud, wallowing in pain, watched as the leg was moved to a small laboratory room. A small syringe filled with what seemed to be an embryo was injected into the limb, and a huge red laser ray thing blasted the leg. Like colckwork, a small replica almost of lord air buds body formed from the limb.

"Isn't it beautiful?" Licorice Bud started. "We take mutated embryos that never formed a body of their own and inject them into living matter that then produces a new body for the embryo. The only problem is, where would the living matter come from? Now you know."

Lord Air bud coughed up blood, but was surprised to see no blood leaking out from his leg injury.

"We injected you with a serum." Licorice bud explained. "It prevents harm and slowly heals your body. In a few weeks, your leg will be as good as new. But I wanted to see you suffer first."

Licorice Bud retrieved the small bud from the lab via metal arm, and held her so that the air buds could see. "Say hello to Rosebud, by the way. I'm sure she will live a very accomplished life. Her body is still partially mutated, so her lifespan will be reduced immensely. Maybe, a couple hundred years?"

The metal arm took Rosebud away, and Licorice Bud turned to face King Air Bud. The metal arm, equipped with saw thing, returned to prepare another procedure.

"And you. An accomplice?" King remained silent, though he was no longer crying, and gritted his teeth. The saw thing chopped off his leg as well, but the canine remained silent. His limb was transferred to the lab and another golden retriever was created.

And so it went on, leg torn off until five golden retrievers were born. "Rosebud, Buddha, Budderball, Mudbud, and B-Dawg. Thank you, air buds, for your spectacular contribution to society. Your legs will heal, and then you will be released. In the meantime, I suggest collecting spoonerisms. It's quite fun."

The screen shut off, leaving the two silent buds to hang suspended by wires. Lord Air Bud was hanging by one paw, while King had two of his legs intact. The Crimson stumps of frozen blood swung side to side.

"Bro?" Lord Air Bud started. He received no response, and the two dogs waited indefinitely in pain.


	27. Chapter 26: a bunch of exposition

Unlocking the door with one paw, Lord Air Bud stepped into his new office, with King in close pursuit. It was their first day as official breeders, and they were not very thrilled about it. At least Lord wasn't, but King was pretty good at chemistry and such so he was pretty chill with it. A Megadrive sitting on a desk sat up against the wall, with a huge silver portal resting beside it. Other than that, the office was completely white, blank like the void sitting at the center of the polyverse.

King sat down, ready to get to work, while Lord sighed, leaning against the wall. The yellow-eyed canine stretched out his paws, getting used to the feel of having legs again. They had healed up a couple weeks before, just in time for their graduation. The brothers were seven years old, after all, so they were considered mature buds now.

Typing away on the BudChem application, King started to produce a bud. While bud production may seem random to some, there are patterns in the genetic code of buds. The great bud scientist Robert Quiznos actually created a system of using units called Quiznos that allow chemists to increase the probability of certain elements. When creating a new bud, the chemist is actually making an incomplete puzzle, if you will. The new bud is like an outlet, ready to react to certain element. When the newborn bud is exposed to the element, they form into a stable bud organism and are officially given a formal name.

The formal name is decided entirely on the element. For example, Licorice Bud's element is licorice, which means his formal name is Licorice Bud. This is just a formal name though, and most buds have an informal nickname, like Lord or King or Robert Quiznos.

Despite the scientific developments of Robert Quiznos though, there have been no discoveries on Bud Types, which are seemingly random. Bud types affect the personality and the gigawatts of the bud, and can change how the bud uses their element.

King started to mix some elements in hopes of creating a bud that would react with soil or the earth, due to the amount of natural disasters on the planet. Getting an increased population of earth buds could help with all the tremors and such. Hitting the enter button with a satisfying click, a bud embryo stone shot out of the Megadrive and through a system of tubes. The bud would be sent to the center of bud development, where it would be shot into the void in the center of the polyverse and hatch. The void was a mass (or anti-mass?) or nothingness, completely white in color, that slowly grew within the center of the polyverse. Any unprotected piece of matter that entered the void would be ripped from existence entirely, without even a chance of being sent to a microverses. Thankfully, membranes could be created that protected matter from the void. Bud embryos created natural membranes when hatched, and the energy within the bud implodes to created a bunch of matter itself. The matter created within a membrane was called a universe. Within each universe sat a chamber holding the newborn bud, who stood in limbo, awaiting exposure to its element so it could create a form for itself. The chamber was locked by a lock, and the key was usually created beforehand by the chemist of the embryo.

That's where the retriever's job came in. Lord was the retriever in their office, because he sucked at chemistry. The retriever was tasked with entering the universe using the portal and searching for the newborn bud. After being found, the retriever would return the bud to the polyverse where it would grow up like any other bud. Locating the bud took about 100 years on average, which would feel like maybe a couple weeks to a bud.

While the retriever searched, the chemist would stay behind and act as the surveyor. The surveyor would use the Megadrive to observe the universe and help triangulate the location of the bud.

You may be asking, why go through all this trouble? Why not breed the bud within the polyverse? Well, due to the insane amount of energy packed into a bud embryo, breeding a bud within the polyverse would create a rip in space that would probably kill everyone, so yeah.

It would take about an hour before the new bud King created would be sent into the void, so they had some down time before Lord would have to start searching. King smiled solemnly at Lord, who responded with an infuriated neutral face. "So what now?" He started. "We just keep working for thousands of years until we die?"

King shrugged, and Lord scowled and turned away. Suddenly, the Megadrive chimed, and King turned to Lord.

"The bud hatched." He said, and with a click, the portal snapped on, opening up a lime green void. Snatching his tools, Lord stomped through the portal and left King alone with his own thoughts surrounding him. King sighed, placing a paw on his forehead and leaning on the desk.

3%, he thought. It's alright.


	28. Chapter 27: A Super Sneaky Secret Plan

Softly shuffling up to the door, the canine slowly pushed it ajar, exposing the blank office. Closing the door behind him, the bud hurried to the Megadrive and opened the BudChem application. Knowing that he was not very good at chemistry though, the bud kinda just combined a bunch of random shit and mashed buttons. He knew enough to create a stable bud at least, but in terms of element composition, he was completely clueless. Obviously someone wasn't listening in their Quiznos class.

Slamming the enter key, a bud shot out of the Megadrive and was sent to the center. After a while, the bud could see the new universe come online in his surveyor application. But this bud wasn't ready for retrieval yet, and started a new bud in the BudChem application. Clicking away into the night, the bud created bud after bud, with a total of seven sent to the center.

Once all seven universes were online, the bud saved all the universe files in a zipped folder within the deepest corner of the Megadrive UI. Clearing his BudChem history, the bud closed the Megadrive and slowly shifted out from the door, carefully dealing it behind him. And like a thief in the night, the bud activated sneak mode and steal the out of the office complex.


	29. Chapter 28: Sean is great

For the past 70 years, King Air Bud had had a pretty good record. They had almost located their first hatched bud, and were making good time. Most other newbies were either making a bunch of unstable buds, or still had a couple hundred years before retrieving their bud, so in comparison, King and Lord were doing pretty grand.

So when two bulls showed up at the door, King had a small heart attack. It probably had something to do with the fact that the last time King saw these guards, he lost two of his legs. With a wavering voice, King greeted the two buds.

"You're coming with us." The bud on the right commanded. "You are needed by the great Licorice Bud."

Licorice Bud? King thought. Why would he need me?

Hesitantly, King followed the two buds, who led him into some sort of limousine. One of the bulls got into the driver seat, the other in the passenger seat. The limo drove off, and King sat in silence.

"Coffee?" The sudden voice shocked King, and looking up, he saw the silhouette of Licorice Bud. Somehow, despite being in direct sunlight, every part of his body was a shadow, and his form was indistinguishable, almost blob-like. He was holding a cup of coffee, but because of the whole silhouette thing, it just looked like a mug suspended in the air.

King, flustered, nodded quickly and Licorice Bud poured a steaming pot of coffee into a small mug, handing it to the canine. After a slow, hesitant sip of the scorching liquid, King asked the intimidating shadow, "So, w-what did you need m-me for?"

Licorice Bud set down his mug, and despite his hidden eyes, King could feel his piercing stare. "I'd just like to know why, for the past 70 years, you've built up over 7000 universes. There's no way you could retrieve all those buds in your lifetime. What exactly do you have in mind for these universes?"

King stiffed up like a plank and started with a quivering voice, "s-seven thousand universes? S-sorry sir, but I'm afraid I don't know what you're t-talking about. W-we only made the one u-universe-"

"Don't lie to me, Air Bud." Licorice Bud interrupted in a demanding voice. King went pale as Licorice Bud continued. "According to reports from the center of bud development, several universes have been made every night for the last 70 years. They must be saved somewhere on you Megadrive, hm? I just want to warn you that every universe you make takes up valuable space in the void, and I would hate to have all that space wasted."

"I swear, I don't know anything!" King stuttered.

A brief silence followed, until it was broken by the terrified yelp of King as something gripped his shoulder. King turned to see some kind of appendage extending out from Licorice Bud and patting his shoulder, still drowned in shadow. The grip felt surprisingly soft, yet forceful.

"I knew you were a loyal bud, Air Bud." Licorice Bud complimented, with a suddenly brighter demeanor. King, shocked, responded with a soft "What?"

Licorice Bud recoiled his appendage to the side of his body, and it seemed to fold up beside his torso. "You always were very truthful, King Air Bud. Even when we last met, I could tell that you had no malice."

King intently listened on as Licorice Bud read him like a book. "You seem like a genuinely good bud, but you're held back by something, or rather, someone." Licorice Bud took a sip of coffee. "Your brother."

King was taken aback. "N-not really, he's fine..."

Licorice Bud wore a smile filled with pity. "You are much too forgiving. The records don't lie, King, so if you don't know about the many universes created by your Megadrive, it must have been your brother."

"N-no!" King was almost shouting. "Why would he want to make all those universes?"

"That's what I'm trying to figure out." Licorice Bud muttered calmly. "And you're going to help me."

"M-me?!" King responded.

"Yes. You guys are almost done retrieving your bud, right?"

"Well, yes. We've located the planet on which the bud is currently locked up. It should take us only another couple days."

"Great. I need you to go with your brother on the next few retrieval missions."

"Me? Who's going to survey?"

"Don't worry about that, Air Bud. This is a direct order. I need you to follow Lord Air Bud on the next couple missions and monitor him. Make sure he's not doing any funny business, and try to ask him why he might be doing this. I will expect a report from you by next week."

"O-ok..." King Air Bud hesitantly confirmed. "I don't think he's responsible for this, but I'll see what I can do."

Licorice Bud gave Air Bud an invisible somber smile as the limousine pulled back up to the Air Bud household. One of the bulls opened the door to escort King out. As King started to step out, he heard Licorice Bud whisper under his breath: "Release your hatred..."

The limousine drove off, leaving King Air Bud sitting alone in the open field. He gazed up at the house they built above the field, the intimidating building looking down on him. With a sigh, he started up the hill to his house.


	30. Chapter 29: bankruptcy

"So," started the seemingly energetic canine. "See any good movies lately?"

Lord Air Bud glared in reply to King, grunting and continuing on. The bud brothers were on a small, dodecahedronic planet with a green sky and blue grass. The entire planet was basically a wasteland, and all in all, it fucking sucked.

But, if King's calculations were correct, they would find the newborn bud on this planet. Lord Air Bud gripped the silver key that they designed to open the bud's cell with an intense death grip, his eyes sparked with Paroxysm gigawatts. "I'm going to ask one more god damn time." the bud said. "Why, the FUCK, are you here?"

King Air Bud smiled. "I just wanna hang out with my bro, you know?"

Lord looked at King with so much malice, King felt like he was going to drop dead. The yellow-eyed bud frustratingly turned around. "We're here."

King looked up, seeing a Roman architecture esque building with a large door and a silver lock. "Whoa, that's pretty rad man!" spouted King, trying to play the whole spy thing cool.

Stepping up the marble steps, Lord Air Bud placed his front left paw on the door to balance himself as he unlocked the door with his other front paw. With a satisfying click, the key dissolved, and the door creaked open with ease.

The two buds cautiously entered the room, seeing a white, glowing ball of pure energy. "So that's it?" King asked, despite expecting no answer. "That's a bud embryo?"

The energy suddenly zipped past the buds and out the door, and when the ball made contact with the grass, the bud brothers heard a thud. Lord air Bud dashed out of the door, stumbling to see the newborn bud. What he saw was a small golden retriever with green eyes and blue-tinted fur.

"Aww, how cute!" King excitingly spouted after seeing the new bud.

Lord stared into the bud's eyes with growing intensity. Picking him up, the yellow-eyed bud went completely silent, right before CRUSHING THE SMALL PUP IN HIS PAWS AND SLAMMING THE BUD ONTO THE GROUND, BRIGHT RED BLOOD GUSHING OUT OF EVERY CREVICE!

"BRO!" King exclaimed with fear. Lord Air Bud turned to face his brother, his yellow eyes burning with anger, quite literally. King noticed a small crack in his brother's right eye, a common sign of a bud outbreak.

"Bro?" King pleaded as Lord towered over him. In an outbreak, a bud lets out their true potential, fueled by their emotions. This usually leads to disaster, especially for a Paroxysm bud such as Lord Air Bud. The canine dashed toward his brother, flinging 12 dirking devices straight into King's aorta. Coughing up blood, the verdant-eyed canine was devastated by an insane gigawatt-charged uppercut by his brother, sending him flying out the atmosphere and into the dark depths of the universe.

"B-brother..." King let out his final words as his spirit started to escape his body and search for a new object to inhabit.

Lord Air Bud, fueled by rage, looked down upon the bloody pulp of a bud. Crushing his brain with his paw, Lord dashed to the teleporter on one of the planet's twelve sides. With a few clicks, he returned to his office.

As if on cue, Lord heard slamming on his office door.

"BY ORDER OF PRESIDENT LICORICE BUD, YOU ARE UNDER ARREST!"

Lord rushed to the Megadrive, selecting one of the many universes he created (fittingly named the FUCK universe) and dragged the time slider up a few billion years. Setting the teleporter for the FUCK universe, Lord jumped through the portal as the two bulls he had been acquainted with all those years ago rushed in. As they charged into the teleporter, the portal suddenly vanished.

With another well-executed uppercut, Lord demolished the teleporter on the other side, closing the portal in his office. He had escaped. He could rest.

Lord Air Bud gazed at the universe around him. He saw a bright sun, a red planet, a couple ringed planets. But most interestingly, he noticed a planet with a single moon, that looked very similar to his home planet. The green land, surrounded by entire oceans of blue...

He made a mental note to check it out in the morning. But, for the time being, as his yellow fires went out, he decided to get some rest...


	31. Chapter 30: The Era of thomAs Lloyd Turp

Floating indefinitely through the void of space, the yellow-eyed canine started to descend onto the green-blue planet below. Checking his pocket, he confirmed that he still had the yellow sphere his brother had made over 70 year prior. Although he was fully aware that he had killed him, and he did kinda hate him, the thought of his company was comforting to the vicious bud.

Flames rushed around the bud as he rocketed through the atmosphere. With a huge crash, the dog comet landed in the grass. Lord Air Bud half-expected somebody to come up and punch him in the face while spouting "welcome to earth", but sadly, that didn't happen. Peeking out from the crater, the bud saw a suburban town with humanoid creatures just walking around in their cars.

Taking a few cautious steps, Lord noticed a large van coming straight at him, a large ANIMAL CONTROL banner on the side.

Suddenly, a huge net rocketed towards him, preparing his qwirkle technique, he got ready to fight, only to find himself completely out of gigawatts since his outbreak. Ballz, he thought. This is the end.

The bud sat in the back of the van, trapped in the latticed net. The creature squatting next to him wore a smug smile, to which Lord growled.

When they arrived at the pound, Lord was hauled into a crowed cage next to a bunch of other creatures that looked like buds. Lord tried to communicate with them, but he knew that they weren't buds, as their eyes were black and lifeless.

And so, for weeks, Lord was helpless in his prison. Then, one fateful day, a tall man in a ridiculous outfit entered the pound. Leaning down to the cage, he gestures towards Lord, and within minutes, Lord was sitting within the evil clutches of this man.

"You're going to be perfect for our act, Old Blue." Said the ringmaster. Lord growled in response, and he was absolutely thrilled to see what his circus-filled future would hold.

END OF PART 1


	32. VOLUME 2: CLOSED CIRCUIT

Sgt. Pepper looked over his desk, down upon the array of animals before him: 5 golden retrievers, a goat, a bloodhound, a pig, and a wolf, to be specific. Beside them stood Cesar, the famous dog whisperer.

"Can you repeat what they said again?" Pepper asked.

Cesar sighed. "Basically their leader 'Licorice Bud' sent them to find Air Bud and kill him if he was still alive. They're all mutated however, which disables them from fully realizing their elements and 'bud types'. Because of this, killing them alone would be suicide, so they came to you for help. Also they found this goat named Billy who also wanted to join for some reason and now here they are."

Pepper leaned back in his chair. "I see." Organizing his files, he turned to face the buds. "well, Air Buddies, was it? After reviewing your offer, I've decide to accept. You will work doing hard surveillance on air bud. The golden retrievers will act as his pups, and the others can provide back up for them. Understood?"

The buds nodded, and Pepper smiled creepily.

"Willow? It's time to initiate Phase 2 of Operation B.U.D."


	33. Chapter 31: The Penguin, the Rosebud, an

As Dominic stared intently into the orange atmosphere of wherever the fuck they were, he felt calm as shit. Like so calm, even Spencer's cursing and screaming didn't break the tranquility Dom held. He was just mesmerized by the marshmallow clouds and the tangerine sky.

His vision blurred, and through the myopia Dom saw a girl. She turned to Dom and smiled, as he gazed into her kaleidoscope eyes. The hypnotizing trance Dom was caught in, with the girls eyes as the peaceful harbinger, could not be broken.

that is, until Dom and his friends hit the ground and he broke his right arm. Fuck, he thought. How am I going to masturbate now? Dom blacked out, his vision darker than licorice.

/

"Dominic?"

Dom heard a somewhat familiar voice. Opening his spiritual eyes, he saw a small golden retriever.

"Oh. It's you." Dom said with disgust.

"You must wake up Dominic, you are not ready to achieve nirvana yet!"

"Can you just shut up with your stupid one liners already? Seriously, it's like you're reading from a script from some stupid made for tv kids movie."

GET IT?!

"Dominic, your friends need you!"

"Whatever. How are we not all dead, anyways?"

"Maybe you would know if you WOKE THE FUCK UP!"

"Well maybe I would if you would SHUT THE FUCK UP BUDDHA!"

"Humph. Whatever, die, see if I care." The canine tried to put on a calm guise once again and faded from Dom's vision.

"Ugh. Here we go."

Screaming in pain, Dom got up from his rest by leaning on both of his arms, blood fountaining out of his right arm.

"OH FUCK!" Spencer screamed in surprise. "HE'S AWAKE!"

Debra walked in. "Oh, that's great OH MY GOD WHAT THE FUCK"

Debra rushed to Dom with a haphazard heap of bandages and plugged up Dom's blood fountain. "LIGHT BUD! I THINK WE NEED THE SERUM AGAIN!"

"What is it this time?" Mumbled a quaint looking penguin with a top hat and a monocle. Before Dom even had time to fathom a talking penguin, the penguin jumped in shock and dirked Dom right in the face with a syringe.

Injecting a strange concoction into his bloodstream, the penguin said to Dom, "Your wounds should be healed in a few weeks. For now, you should probably not use your right arm. If you need to masturbate, I'm sure Spencer will be willing to help."

"WHAT THE FUCK?!" Spencer screamed. "NO! FUCK NO! IM LEAVING!" Spencer slammed the door on his way out.

"Stay safe out there!" The penguin yelled after him. Debra removed the bandages, and the blood fountain was no more. Dom felt his entire arm go numb, and carefully sitting himself up using his left arm, he politely inquired, "WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON"

"Here, I'll get Rosebud, she's good at explaining this." Debra said. "Rose!"

"Yee?" Said Rosebud, stepping into the room. "Oh, you're awake! About time."

Debra stepped back. "Yeah, he needs the rundown."

Rosebud sighed. "Here we go again. Luckily, this is the last time I have to do this."

Rosebud sat down beside Dom. "So, we all landed in a new universe. This bud named Light Bud found us and"

"Hold on. What the fuck is a bud?"

"Oh right. Basically every universe is basically just a way to breed creatures called buds which look like animals from earth because on their planet they evolved very similarly to us. Each universe is created from the BUd Polyverse, which is where their planet lies. Apparently the president of the buds sent this bud here, named Light Bud, to find us and train us to kill Air Bud."

"Why though? Earth is already donezos."

"Well, apparently Air Bud is some kind of criminal on their world. The leader heard that we were human bud hybrids and decided that we may be able to stop Air Bud if we worked together."

"Ok...? Well, how is Light Bud talking to me right now?"

Rosebud sighed. "Time for an anatomy lesson. Ok, so because we are clones of buds, we share similar anatomy. This is important because it means we have a special organ in our prefrontal cortexes called a capacitor. Basically a capacitor stores gigawatts which are basically condensed energy. The abilities of gigawatts depend on the bud type and element of the bud, which we'll explain later. Since buds are still basically animals, they don't have vocal chords. Instead, buds talk using gigawatts, and so Light Bud was sending gigawatts into your capacitor that translated into English."

"Ok, anything else?"

"I'll take you on a tour of the HQ in a second, but the last protip I have for you is that I basically changed my name to Rosebud now so yeah"

"Why?"

Rosebud sighed, gazing out of the window. "Er... Sentimental reasons..."

"Ok?"

"Also Don changed his name to Sniffer for some reason. Something about Hope or some gay shit idk"

"Alrighty. So I guess you should show me around."

"Yee." Rosebud got up, helping Dom up onto his legs. The two stepped down the hall, Dom stumbling to keep up with Rosebud.

"So we have this cool little shelter house thingy set up here. To your left you got our bedrooms. We each have our own rooms, but you can bunk together if you want to. Yours is the furthest to the right."

Rosebud creaked the door ajar, allowing Dom to take a peek inside. The room was small, with a wooden bed frame sheltering a thin mattress. On the opposite side of the room, a small table sat with a bunch of scattered objects: a set of Lotería cards, a plastic, transparent ball, and a small Apple 2 computer hooked up to an antenna.

"We didn't really know how your future vision shit worked, so we just took all we could think of."

"The closest thing you had to tarot cards is Lotería?"

"Look man, I'm not a thirst quencher over here."

The two continued down the hallway. Rosebud led Dom into a large room with a long, narrow table. Chairs were set up with empty dishes along the table.

"Here's the dining area. Debra makes some pretty good food, and you'll be able to catch up with the team at dinner tonight."

"Radical dude"

Rosebud and Dom then entered the lounge, with a television hooked up to a satellite dish and a Nintendo 64, plus some other strange contraptions. There was also a bunch of tables, couches, and chairs, and three tall lamps sat bunched up in the corner of the room. A shelf contained a fuckton of board games, (including Scrabble, which Dom made sure to avoid after hearing horror stories about it from Charles) and 14 copies of Cory in the House season 3 on VHS.

"Yeah, this is just our hangout area. It's where we hang out."

"Cool."

The two peeps then walked outside from the lounge. Dom was blown back by a warm breeze as he observed the light, sandy dunes that engulfed the area around their humble abode. From what he could see, their headquarters was completely isolated from any other life, the arid landscape being their only company.

"We chose a satellite location because we're kinda incognito right now."

"Incognito from what?"

"According to Light Bud, sometimes bud criminals are exiled to various universes. And these buds are bad newzzz if you know what I mean"

The two dudes stepped down a flight of stairs that connected the surface to the house. In the front yard, various tools, weapons, and other stuff were set up. Dom saw that this was the hippest place to be, as Josh, Sniffer, Spencer, and Geoff were training with the various tools. Geoff seemed to be adding more mechanical contraptions to his soaps, Josh was was flinging a loosely chained mace around, Sniffer was attempting to sword fight with a wooden dummy (and failing miserably), and Spencer was throwing dirking devices as usual.

"Hey, you're awake!" Josh greeted.

"Yo" Geoff waved.

"Sup" Dom replied, as Rosebud cleared her throat.

"Here's the training grounds. It's where we train."

"I never would've guessed."

"Basically we're still working on finding what kind of fighting styles fit each of us. Some peeps like Geoff and Spencer already have a style going, but Sniffer, Josh, and Debra seem to be struggling."

"What about you?"

Rosebud shrugged. "I already got all the firearm skillz. Later on we'll have you out on the training grounds to find your style."

"Aight."

The two said goodbye to the others and stepped back into the small abode. Rosebud led Dom back to his room.

"I know you're not a super social dude, so I'm just going to leave you here to hang out in your room and have an existential crisis or some shit. Dinner's in a few hours, we'll call you when it's ready."

"Tight."

"If you need anything, ask Light Bud I guess, but" Rosebud leaned in closer to Dom. "If I were you, I would be a bit cautious with that guy. I don't know, let's just say I don't trust him that much."

"Yeah, but you say that with everybody."

Rosebud sighed. "I guess. It's just, after Pepper, I feel like I can't trust anyone."

Dom put his hand on Rosebud's shoulder. "Hey, you can trust me. You can trust all of us. We're your friends."

Rosebud looked slowly into his eyes...

"Well that was super gayyyyyyyyyyyy"

"You know what I was just trying to be nice for once god"

Rosebud snorted, leaving to go into the lounge. Dom shut the door behind him and leaped onto the bed. He then regretted it because damn that bed was so thin be basically broke his back. As he was wallowing in pain, he felt something dig into his right thigh. Reaching into his pocket, he retrieved the alluring key he had uncovered in his household. For safekeeping, he placed the key in the drawer of the table beside his bed.

Dom decided to take some time to contemplate this whole mess. He stared into the wood paneled ceiling, and let his mind drift away...

See you space cowboy...


	34. Chapter 32: Uh Oh

Lord Air Bud banged his head against the wall as the portal suddenly disappeared.

"Damn." He said. "Not here."

As the canine sidled down the steel wall, his eyes stopped burning with vengeful anger. He had lost the last memory of his brother he had, and now the only trace of his spirit was held in the theoretical museum of Lord's many victims. Just another soul violated by the early embrace of death.

Lord cringed at the thought of his biggest mistake, and tried to shake away his nightmares. He had to think rationally. First off, what do I do now. Well, this is where Lord got stuck. He didn't really have a plan except to find the embryo and hope for the best...

The embryo! That's right! Lord sniffed furiously, searching for the key which he had held dear for all those years. Although it was a literal key, it was also a metaphorical key to Lord's last hope to initiating his honorable tyranny. Lord used his sniffer to locate said key, and the scent led him to the teleporter.

Well, this doesn't make sense. Why would the key be in the teleporter? Unless...

No. Oh no. It can't be.

"Bakana." Lord coughed in frustration.

Suddenly, everything came together. He recalled the glint in one of the kid's right pocket. He must've... Had the key...

But how? How did Lord lose the key? Lord's eyes flared a bright yellow once again, as he slammed his head against the wall. Lord, worked up in anger, typed furiously on the control panel to reactivate the portal. With his Megadrive knowledge, he was easily able to navigate his way through the primitive human computer and searched through the portal history to find the last teleported location. Selecting the displayed universe, the portal was up and running again, and Lord leaped through it to find the key: his last hope.


	35. Chapter 33: royale banquetz

"And then I said, that's not a soufflé, that's my wife!"

Josh laughed maniacally to himself as the others sitting along the dining table stared at him with blank faces.

"W-what?" Geoff inquired.

Josh chuckled. "Just- Forget about it..."

"Ok...?"

And there they were. The entire Operation BUD crew was seated for their dining experience, save for Debra, who was the official cook. She usually went hunting with Reosir and brought back meat which she cooked into masterpieces.

Light Bud was also there, sitting in the middle right of the table, all Jesus like. On his plate rested precisely 15 croissants, which harshly contrasted to the white, empty plates of the rest of the crew. Dom nudged Sniffer with his elbow. "Whats up with the croissants?"

Sniffer leaned over. "Apparently it's like a big part of Bud diet or something. I don't know, croissants make up half of what he ever talks about."

Light Bud eloquently took a bite of a croissant, looking out of the window. "What a beautiful planet. chew" he turned to face the others. "This feels like a picnic."

The rest of the crew sat with blank expressions, just waiting for Light Bud to shut up. Luckily Debra walked in to break the awkward one-sided conversation with a stake like dirking device stabbed through some blorange-colored meat. "Yeah I didn't really know anything about animals on this planet so I'm not sure if this is even healthy to eat. If we all die of disease, it's not my fault."

"Alright?" Geoff said as a block of meat was flopped onto his plate.

Once everybody had food served, Josh reached for his fork, but was quickly stopped by a spark of red gigawatts from Light Bud. "Ouch!" Josh recoiled his hand while Light Bud tsked disapprovingly. "It's rude for you to eat before we have done the MARIO chant!"

Light Bud and the rest of the crew all clasped each other's hands in a circle around the table, waving back in forth like cacti. "Mario, Mario, let me in." Sniffer began. "Mario, Mario, let me in!" The rest echoed. Soon enough, the entire crew was in complete synchronization. "MARIO MARIO LET ME IN!" The crew hollered, applauding as Sniffer bowed for starting the ritual.

The group began to eat the blorange colored meat as if it was cauliflower. "Dang Debra," Josh mumbled in between chews. "This is pretty good."

"Thanks!" She replied, holding Reosir as she pecked at her now cooked prey. "It was pretty fun watching the life being squeezed out of some random animal I've never seen before."

Spencer shuddered in response to this statement, making everyone stop and stare. "Anything wrong, Spenc?" Rosebud asked.

"No!" Spencer tapped the table with his lustrous fork with greater intensity.

"You shuddered when Debra talked about life getting squeezed out of an animal!" Josh accused, Spencer shuddering again. "Is it possible that the cruel, ruthless Spencer has a soft spot?"

"No! Fuck you!" Spencer sent egg yolk colored gigawatts through his fork in anger.

"You aren't eating your food either..." Debra passive-aggressively glared down at Spencer's unpunctured meat, Reosir menacingly perched on her shoulder. "Is there something wrong with it?"

Spencer clenched his fork, slamming his fist onto the table with a splash of yellow sparks. "Fine! I'm a vegan, okay?" He screamed. "Is that what you want? IM A FUCKING VEGAN!"

The silence lingered, and Dom set down his glass nonchalantly as everyone else stared at Spencer. "What the fuck do you mean though?" Geoff asked.

"It MEANS that I DONT INGEST ANIMAL PRODUCTS, GEOFF! IF THAT EVEN IS YOUR REAL NAME!" Spencer scoffed.

"But...But... I thought you liked killing and stuff." Sniffer argued softly

Spencer smirked. "I like killing people. Because they suck dick. But animals... are amazing. Don't FUCK with my animals."

"So..." Rosebud interjected. "What now?"

Spencer leaned over his neglected meal, pointing his fork at Rosebud. "Oh, tomorrow, I'll show you a meal. I appoint myself the secondary chef, and I am going to make the BEST GOD DAMN MURDER-FREE MEAL EVER MADE!"

Debra leaned towards Spencer, smiling. "I didn't know you could cook."

Spencer grasped Debra's hands, interlocking their fingers like Velcro. "That's because I haven't shown you my expertise. Together, we'll be an UNSTOPPABLE FORCE!"

Geoff interrupted the display of inspiration, coughing into his fist. "Are you nerds going to keep talking, or are we going to eat?"

Debra and Spencer sat down, Spencer eating from a cucumber he left in his pocket. Soon enough, the plates were clean, the ghostly porcelain revealing itself.

Light Bud wobbled out of the room, saluting the rest of the crew. "I'm going to go to sleep now. Make sure to get your rest, especially you, Dom. You're going to be out on the field tomorrow."

"K" Dom mumbled, shuffling into his room.

The crew went their separate ways, and the lights dimmed in the Operation BUD headquarters. A new day lay on the horizon, filled with new opportunities.

And new danger.

Bum bum buyuhuhhm


End file.
